Life, 1912-09-26 · page 15 of 48
Life — September 26, 1912 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical page mocks emerging political and social reform movements through absurdist humor. **"Our Platform"** parodies a new political party's promises by listing ridiculous "benefits": sleepable train seats, sexless novels, and recall of bothersome things (office boys, daughters, Andrew Carnegie). The satire suggests reformers make extravagant, impractical promises. **"Our Woman's Column"** uses exaggeration to mock women's activism and suffrage movements. References include women "breaking into Windsor Castle" (violent suffragettes), "fallen women" forming a political party, and parents arrested for disciplining daughters who use makeup and dance the "grizzly bear" (modern dance). The tone is dismissive—presenting women's rights advocates as ridiculous troublemakers. **The top engraving** titled "Dedication of the Church of the Holy Dividends" appears to satirize wealth worship, depicting religious ceremony applied to financial gain. Overall, the page ridicules progressive reforms—suffrage, labor improvements, women's independence—as absurd threats to social order.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
-LIFE 1851 RTALIAPEC TOE Our Platform (Announcement of a New Party) view of the fact that in case we are elected the government, under our charge, will be able to give the people anything they want, we don’t Propose to be so stingy as some other platform makers. If, therefore, the people have any discernment, they will put us_ in} power and enjoy the following bene- fits: Pullman car seats that you can actually go to sleep in. Sexless novels ( umpires’ Recall of Somat (_ wives’ Whistleless office boys. Powderless daughters. . ss habies. Noise (to Scotland) of Andrew Revision of all sermons and after- dinner speeches. DEDICATION OF THE CHURCH OF THE HOLY DIVIDENDS Our Woman's Column (hat Women Are Doing All Over the World) Ss} “ERAL ladies broke into Wind- sor Castle last Thursday and came near murdering King George. They were severely reprimanded by the nearest judge, who said he really ought not to let them off, but would do so if they promised to be good. Two million outcast women in America are getting together to form a fallen woman's party, just as soon as woman suffrage is universal; they ex- pect to put through several important measures, and will probably control the next elections. One of the most promising fairy stories of the season is written by a young girl not yet out of her teens and who is said to have a vivid imagi- nation, The title is “ The Suffragette’s Several parents who complained that their fifteen-year-old daughters were using paint, and dancing the grizzly bear, were arrested yesterday on com- plaint of their daught After being severely reprimanded for annoying their children they were discharged. A repetition of the offense will un- doubtedly land them in jail. Making Progress “TO VEN as an ambulance surgeon young Squills is showing re- markable aptitude for his profession.” “Yes, 1 understand he actually once “GOODNESS GRACIOUS! 1 fo BE told the difference between a drunken LIEVE THAT CREATURE'S TRYING TO man and one with a fractured skull.” FLIRT WITH ME” comicbooks.com