Life — September 12, 1912 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

a TNPAE © PuLAse REmave ined Ouame OFFICE HOURS How po you vo? The Happy State: wuy, WHAT bO YOU THINK OF HEAVE: “GREAT; BUT IT DOESN'T TOUCH TEXAS.” Nonsense The revolt of woman is the revolt against that degra- dation that would condemn them to a single function— motherhood. They have reached t © in their in tellectual evolution when they no longer regard maternity as the ultima thule, There is no revolt for the instinct of sex is too powerful to be suppressed but there is a te demand that woman be ree: nized as man That de demand for equality—has been perverted, deliberately and through ignorance, It does hot mean that woman claims to be man’s physical or in- tellectual equal; what it does mean is that woman asks to be considered as man’s equal within her own Ji tions and not to be looked upon as his inferior based solely upon the fact of sex. A. Maurice Low in the North American Review. J mean that one woman in about one thousand feels this way, and this because her instincts have been perverted But you don't mean it about the nine hundred and ninety-nine other women who feel’nothing of the sort. These nine hundred and ninety-nine women are too much occupied with other things lieve that men are superior. They know altogether too much to believe such non- Besides, they don’t be- sense as that Little Orphant Teddy (With profound apologies to James Whitcomb Riley) L! TLE Orphant Teddy's come to our house to stay, To clean things up as well as out, an’ raise the deuce they say; An’ shoo the Bosses off the stoop floors, An’ kick the Magnets off their pereb, and lock doors. An’ all us other children, we'm have promised to be good Er little Orphant Teddy he won't let us have no food; An’ we jest set an’ listen to the spooks he tells about, An’ the Big Bull Moose * an’ dust the White House ‘em out o° Ef yo I Oneet they was a great big t muveer would behave, An’ allers gobbled up the gold ‘at other peoples save, An’ when it grabbed most all there was a feller he come rountl With great big teeth a-flarin’, an’ they made a serunchin’ sound, An’ when the man ‘at made the Trust come lookin’ for his shares They wasn’t any Trust al An’ all he found was jest a spot, ‘lonyside a water-spout, An’ the Big Bull Moose ‘Il git you MH around there anywheres— Ef you Do: Watch c An’ one time another chap ‘at useter fila lot Come runnin’ round a cornder for to tell some news he'd got, An’ fore he knowed where he was at there come a grindin’ noise Like thirty-seven An’ down from summers in the air there come a fearful flub An’ that there feller he got hit with th’ Annie Nius Club! It crushed him, an’ it squushed him, it slammed him all about, An’ the Big Bull Moose ‘Il git you Ff you Don't Watch Ou! iunts catin’ ninety-leven boys, tle Orphant Teddy says he’s goin’ to take the carth a lambastin’ jest for all thet he is worth. am, an’ soon as he is through goin’ to tackle Yurrup, an’ the folks in Asia too; An’ when he’s cleaned ‘em up he says he’s goin’ to take the Sea An’ pore it down the black hole where the Devil's said to be; An’ then he's xoin’ to Heaven, where he'll tell ‘em all about The Bull Moose as ‘ll get them Ef they Don't Watch € John Kendrick Bangs. comicbookeeee