Life, 1912-08-08 · page 5 of 40
Life — August 8, 1912 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising**, not political satire. The dominant content is a Pond's Extract Company advertisement for Vanishing Cream, featuring a woman in a polka-dot bathing suit at a beach. The ad promises sun protection without "discomforts" like blistering or burning. The left column contains "Rhymed Reviews" discussing "The Citadel" (a Samuel Merwin novel) and mocking a congressman named Garwood from Illinois who opposed the Constitution. Below that is an advertisement for Carstairs Rye whiskey. The bottom of the page includes verse commentary on literary figures and authors, apparently satirizing contemporary writers' debates about "Fact and Theory." The page reflects 1920s-30s consumer culture and light political humor rather than substantial political cartooning.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Rhymed Reviews The Citadel The Century Co.) (By Samuel Merwin, As Nicholson's Graft-fighting Boy Of Hosierdom was Danicl Harwood, Our Congressman from Ilinois 5 the rhyme—his jarwood,” Supplies name is He'd worn the Grand Old Party's yoke, And served his terin with commen tion, When suddenly his mind awoke To what it+was that Ailed the Nation. So up he sprang from out his seat, And, facing certain retribution, Attacked, with some degree of heat, Our Venerated Constitution! Said he: “ You fear this man-made code As Hans and Gretel feared the ogress; This Ancient Fetish bars our road, Its dogmas block the Wheels of Prog- ress. “The Sacred Parchment’s had its day; A People’s urgent needs transcend it. Let’s chuck the blamed old thing away, Or make it easy to amend it!” In consequence the Powers of Night you a rich, beautiful tan. Established 1788 Time Counts: 100—20—4 As the number of years that Carstairs Rye has been the American favorite. ““Mine Host’? at Ye Old Log Tav- erncounted Carstairs Rye the ‘‘best the house af- fords’’—and the boniface at our Twentieth Century palatial hotels holds equal high regard. There's the same smooth flavor; the same 100% purity; the same satisfying delight ina whiskey that “tastes so different.” Fine ryes scientifically blended and aged in wood. If your dealer should not happen to have it, we'll send it to youthrough him at usual prices. Write Stewart Distilling Co. Phita, New York Balto. Pond’s Extract for Nothing else com- Mosquito Bites ates with Pond’s xtract for reliev- ing mosquito bites. Ittakesthesting and smartoutimmediately; it Ailis the itching, revents poisoning. ‘The favorite house- fold preparation for cuts, burns, bruises and other everyday injuries. Keep a bottle on hand always, or you will wish for it a thousand times during this hot weather. Our tooth Get all the benefits of Summer sunshine but avoid the discomforts you will find that your skin will not blister and burn half as readily if you protect it before exposing it. Extract Vanishing Cream, then wipe it off completely with a soft towel. Then powder thoroughly. If exposed so long to extreme heat that protection is impossible, use the following method of relieving sunburn. The moment you come in, after a gentle washing, rub on a thick coat of Vanishing Cream and allow it to remain on as long as possible. soften the dried, scorched skin and keep it from peeling, leaving This method is used among rowing men and is their favorite remedy for sunburn. Pond'’s Extract @mpany's VANISHING CREAM ste, talcum powder, cold cream and soap have the same individu- ality which characterizes all of the products of the Pond’s Extract Company. They are diferent from ordinary toilet preparations, Apply Pond’s It will TryThese Products On request, we at Our Expense will mailsamples of both Pond’s Extract and Vanishing Cream. Upon receipt of 4 cents in stamps, we will send an extra large trial tube of Van- ishing Cream. Address The Pond’s Extract Co., Dept. L, 131 Hudson Street, New York. Why not try them? And though he fairly gained the fight By Fraud they found a way to beat him, But what's the odds! The People’s Choice, daunted. Besides, he’s won his Margaret, The freakish lady whom he wanted, He's battling yet, resolved, un- © Earnest Authors, hurling Fact And Theory at idols hoary, Reflect! A Novel’s not a Fract, 1545 Your Preachment should not swamp your Story. Your readers yawn with strange alarm At heroines of great acumen But quite devoid of normal charm— Oh, let your Men and Maids be hu- man! And lest some ruder pen than mine Should dub you “ Literary Faki Remember, please, that “ Frankenstein” Was not the Monster, but his maker. —Arthur Guiterman, comicbooks.com