Life, 1912-07-25 · page 33 of 41
Life — July 25, 1912 — page 33: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising and advice content** rather than political satire. The main feature is a "Brainy Diet" advertisement by food expert G.H. Brinkler, promoting a pseudo-scientific dietary system based on matching foods to bodily systems (nerves, muscles, etc.). It's typical early-20th-century health quackery, requesting detailed personal information from "consultants" before providing dietary advice. The small cartoons are light social humor: - **"A Paying Guest"**: Absurdist joke about a man pardoned from prison being told he must pay the state for room and board before leaving—satire on bureaucratic absurdity. - **"Clever Host"**: A woman entertains herself by looking at photographs of herself—gentle mockery of vanity. - **"Another Straw Vote"**: A young man wins a family poll as the preferred suitor—mild romantic humor. The remaining advertisements promote patent medicines, rugs, and beverages typical of the era. The page reflects early-1900s American consumer culture and dubious health claims.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
4 Oct. C. A Paying Guest Prison Warpen: It’s just been found out that you didn’t commit that crime you've been in for all these years, and so the Governor has pardoned you. Innocent Man: Um—I'm pardoned, am I? Prison Warven: Y-e-s, but don't go yet. I'll have to telegraph for further instructions. t Man: What about? Warven: Seems to me that considerin’ you hadn't any business her you ought to pay the State for your board.—New York Weekly. PETROFLOWE! Sample 2c. stamp, Antoato Leza, P.O. Box 721, Havana, Cuba. Clever Host Wise: We had quite a prominent actress as a guest at our house the other evenin; Ascum: Gracious! hard to entertain her? Wise: Oh, no! She amused herself for hours. We just handed her a bunch of photographs, among which were sev- eral of her own. —Catholic Standard and Times. Didn't you find it In a Pinch, use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE Another Straw Vote “TI congratulate you,” said the pretty girl. “Why?” asked the young man, who was one of her many admirers. “Father and mother and I took a straw vote last night and you had a clear majority of one. —Chicago Record-Herald. Caront Bitters. The best by tést. sample bottle with patent dasher. and be convinced. Blache & Co., 78 Broad St., New York, Gen'l Distrs Pp UNMERS “LINEN RUGS TOTALLY UNLIKE ALL OTHER RUG! AN INNOVATION IN INTERIOR DECORATING In sixtcen plain and beautiful colors—rich as Orienta's —guaraniced absolutely fast, Full one quarter inch thick but not cumbersome. As pure linen asa table cloth. Distinctively Individual Positively Exclusive Washab‘e, reversib’e, exceptionally durab'e. Made to conform to any decorative scheme—in any size—seam'ess, up to ofeetin width, Write today for illustrated book- let in colors fo the only makers of Linen Rugs in the world. SUMMERS LINEN COMPANY 100 Thomas Street - - Port Huron, Mich. cures dandruff and makes hair grow. Send 25 cents for The Salient Principles of the Brainy Diet Curative Treatment Hardened concretions are dissolved by mild or strong acids (tomatoes, lemons), combined with other suitable foods. 2. Unsound or foreign substances (the cause of ill-health) are eliminated by blood-purifying fresh vege- able: combined with other suitable foods. The nervous system is strengthened by suitable brain or nerve foods (meat, game, poultry, fish, and ay Sivire iene | dai food), combined with other suitable foods. The muscular system is strengthened by muscle, or force, or starchy foods, combined with other suitable foods. 5. The system is best supplied with heat in cold weather by the heating brain or nerve foods (fresh | pork, goose, duck, eels, and custard), combined with other suitable foods. Inflammatory conditions are reduced by cooling, fresh, vegetables, combined with. other suitable A similar dict will also keep the body cool and energetic in hot weather. Intending Consultants Must Answer the Following Questions: 1, Sex? 2. Age?_3. Are you married? 4. Occupation (mental or physical, or both)? 5, Complexion?— Condition of hair and teeth? 6. Temperament? 7. Weight? 8, Height? 9. How do you sleep? 10. do you feel when waking up? 11. Do you ever feel languor? 12. Is distension felt after meals? 13. suffer from constipation? 14. How do the kidneys act? 15. Add any other symptoms you feel. “16. relished? 17. Specify the foods you take. 18, Do you smoke or take alcohol? If so, how much? 19. What fruits and other foods do you prefer? 20. What vegetables and fruits can you obtain? 21, What amount can you spend on food daily? 22. Can you get your food properly cooked? 23. Specify on what subjects you desire information, in addition to learning how to cure your painful and unsightly symptoms. 24. Give any further information which you think will be of service. MY OPINION IS FREE. foods. Inclose the names 2f sick friends. Send ten cents for four very instruc- tive booklets— (4) The New Brainy Diet System (2) Diet vs. Drugs (3) Effects of Foods (4) Key to Longevity G. H. BRINKLER, Food Expert, Dept. 72 G, Washington, (=D. Cc. A Happy Marriage pends largely on a knowl- edge of the whole truth about self and sex and their relation to life and health, nowledge does pot ently of itself, ly from ordinary, every-day sources, SEXOLOGY (UUustrated) by William H. Walling, A.M., Mf.D.,imparts in a clear, wholesome way in one volume Knowledge a Wages No Object “Can't you get any work?" asked a woman of the tramp who had applied at the back door for food. “Yes, ma'am,” he replied. “I was offered a steady job by the man who lives down the road in that big white house.” “That's Mr. Oatsced. work?” “He wanted me to get up at four in the morning, milk seventeen cows, feed, water and rub down four horses, clean the stables, and then chop wood until it was time to begin the day's work. “What did he want to pay?” “T dunno, ma'am. I didn’t stop to ask."—Youth’s Companion. What was the Knowledse a You owledge it You owledze a Mother Shout Knew jedigw a Mother Showk tto Medical Knowledge 1 Wife Should Hav ‘Allie one volume. Ilustrated, $2, postpa! ‘ ‘eople’s Opinions and Table of Contents. Puritan Pub. Co., 776 Perry Bidg., Phila., Pa. Her Daughter. GREAT BEAR SPRING WATER 50 cents per case of G glass stoppered bottles “Waar is neutrality, Pa?” “ The attitude taken by the North Pole in the Peary-Cook controversy.” —Woman's Home Companion. ‘The piquancy of a Sherbet is attained by using a dash of Abbott's Bitters, Sample of bitters by mail, 25 cts. in stamps. C.W. Abbott & Co., Baltimore, Md. When you drink Lomonderry | i it's like going high Y in the cocl mountains and dipping the sparkling water right out Londonderry is good It is good for you physically. of nature's bubbling spring! highest virtue. and not feel uncomfortable. you will remark a new feeling of vigor and bodily freshening. it's a royal blender—it mellows the rich flavor of the liquor. LONDONDERRY LITHIA SPRING WATER CO., for you. _Itrefreshes you—ihat is its It is light. You can drink all you will Drink Londonderry regularly for a while, and Incidentally izes, Plain (still in half gallon bot- ave difficulty obtaining Londonderry ill see that you are supplied at regular retail prices. Nashua, N. H. | UNDER SUSPICION 1492 comicbookeeee