Life, 1912-06-27 · page 26 of 45
Life — June 27, 1912 — page 26: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes Judson Harmon (likely the Ohio politician and 1912 presidential hopeful) through a dialogue mocking his unsuitability for high office. The cartoon's joke: Harmon is *too* qualified—too honest, dignified, conscientious, and intelligent. The satire suggests the American electorate prefers charismatic performers over competent statesmen, and that political success requires compromising integrity (exemplified by the tariff discussion, where politicians manipulate policy to appease "financial crooks"). The accompanying anecdotes mock corporate illogic (the tunnel ticket pricing) and celebrate working-class resilience (old Jeb Perkins drowning in water rather than rum). The humor reflects Progressive-era skepticism toward both corporate malfeasance and political mediocrity masquerading as leadership.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
1310 M HAT’S the use?" Judson looked at Judson Harmon. “The American people,” he said, “don’t want a man of ability unless he happens to be picturesque.” “ But aren’t we picturesque?” This remark made Judson Harmon smile. “Hardly,” he. replied. “You're no actor, Judson.” “T have no desire to be; I’m too dignified for that.” “Precisely. And your sense of humor is—well, a little bit too dignified also; besides——” “Well, besides what?” “You're not neurotic enough, and you don't convey the impression that you are qualified to save the human race once more.” aces sores TAGS “T'm too dignified for that” “T don't talk enough either, do 1?” “Well, not quite. To be a real genuine candidate for the Presidency a man should be a combination of an orator, a vaudeville actor and a Me: “ And we are not that, are we, Judson? “Not quite. Then there is another thing.” “Well?” Judson Harmon looked fearfully around, got up and closed the door, and, coming back, leaned over confidential- ly to Judson Harmon. “My dear sir,” he said, softly, “this is it—we are too much like Taft; we are honest, conscientious, able, con- servative and dull.” be. whispered Judson Harmon in reply, “and in addition we are not so amiable as he.” “But we have more spine, which probably offsets his amiability; and so there you are. No, Judson, it wouldn't do” “But we are a good man—” “EPPE- Intimate Interviews WASHED UP BY THE SEA “Too good, maybe. Why, take the tariff. Think of the difficulty in manipulating it so that the financial crooks who are now running the country would be satisfied and at the same time preserve the appearance of guarding the common people. And that’s only one thing.” “Well, good-bye, Judson.” “Good-bye. Glad to have met you.” A Small Matter IF you go into an Erie ticket office in New York and buy a round-trip ticket to Upper Montclair, N. J., it will cost you sixty cents. This entitles you to a journey in a ferryboat across the Hudson River to Jersey City, where you take the train. But, if you travel to Jersey City through the Hudson Tunnel and then buy a round-trip ticket to Upper Montclair, it will cost you sixty-five cents. It seems to be on the principle of the farther you go the less you pay. We have made no effort to solve the inscrutabilities of this amusing example of up-to-date corporate rules and regulations, but we have no doubt there are dozens of corporation lawyers who could explain it. Perhaps some of these lawyers will write and tell us just how the technicali lie. We hope they will spare us. We are willing to let the matter drop right here. Progress “QEE that chap—three years ago he mortgaged his home to buy an automobile. ame old story?” ~ Yes—now he owns three cars and a bigger house.” ‘oO. JEB PERKINS fell inter the creek last night and was drowned.” That’s what rum does.” “Rum! If the creek had been full o’ rum instead o° water, it wouldn't a hurted old Jeb a particle.” comicbooks.com