Life — May 23, 1912 — page 41: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The “Different” Cigarette 1 am willing to retire before my betters—but as yet I have not found them. MILO. THE SURBRUG COMPANY, New York ; The Abbe Was Safe The study of grammar was the great passion of a certain Abbé Dangeau. One day somebody was talking to him of the apprehensions entertained that some great revolution was about to take place in public affairs. “That may be,” said the Abbé, “but whatever happens, I am extremely rejoiced that I have in my portfolio at least thirty-six conjuga- tions perfectly completed.” D MOTOR GRAPHITE (Pulverized Flake) Work in between the spring leaves and on the bolts Dixon's Motor Graphite mixed with oil, Stops the Boise for good—prevents Tusting. Dixon's Motor Graphite is an ideal lubricant, for it Produces on bearing surfaces a ti veneer-like Coating of marvelous smoothness w prevents metallic contact—reduces friction—and docs away with bot bearings. You will get more power from your engine, your car : part of your car, —— Oe 16 it wtth your own Sholce of nbricente or we will doit ‘Dixon's Motor Graphite, eee “ee 8 your dealer for Dixon's Graphite Lubricant No: 677—a Dibsn's Setar Graphitse Fos for aitereaaaer aed eases ‘Bussions, “More econoeaical than plain oll or grease. free beck, “Lubricatig te Motoe® JOSEPH DIXON CRUCIBLE CO. r Jersey City Eatab, 19 1807 New Jersey Avarice and Generosity “T never blame a man f'r bein’ avaricyous in his ol’ age. Whin a fel- low gits so he has nawthin’ else to injye, whin ivrybody calls him ‘sir’ or ‘mis- ter,’ an’ young people dodge him an’ he sleeps afther dinner, an’ folks say he’s an ol’ fool if he wears a buttonhole bokay, an’ his teeth is only tinants at will an’ not permanent fixtures, ‘tis no more thin nach’ral that he shud begin to look around f'r a way iv keepin’ a grip on human s’ciety. It don’t take him long to see that the on'y thing that’s vin'rable in age is money, an’ he pro- ceeds to acquire anything that happens to be in sight, takin’ it where he can find it, not where he wants it, which is th’ way to accumylate a fortune. “Money won't prolong life, but a few millyons judicyously placed in good banks an’ occas’nally worn on the person will rayjooce age. Poor ol’ men are always older thin poor rich men, In th’ alms- house a man is decrepit an’ mournful looking at sixty, but a millyonaire at sixty is jus’ in th’ prime iv life to a friendly eye, an’ there are no others. “It's aisier to th’ ol’ to grow rich thin it is to th’ young. At making money a man iv sixty is miles ahead iv a la-ad iv twenty-five. Pollytics and bankin’ is th’ on'y two games where age has the best iv it. Youth has betther things to attind to, an’ more iv thim. I don't blame a man f'r bein’ stingy anny more thin I blame him f'r havin’ a bad leg. Ye know th’ doctors say that if ye don’t use wan iv ye'er limbs f'r a year or so ye can niver use it again. So it is with gin’rosity. A man starts arly in life not bein’ gin'rous. He says to himsilf, ‘I wurruked f’r this thing an’ if I give it away I lose it.’ He tics up his gin’rosity in bandages so that th’ blood can’t circylate in it. It gets to be 2 superstition with him that he'll have bad luck if he iver does annything f'r annybody. An’ so he rakes in an’ puts his private mark with his teeth on all th’ movable money in th’ wurruld. But th’ day comes whin he sees people around him gettin’ a good dale iv injye- mint out iv gin'rosity, an’ somewan says: ‘Why don’t ye, too, be gin'rous? Come, ol’ green goods, unbelt, loosen up, be gin’rous.’ ‘Gin'rous?’ says he. ‘What's that?’ ‘It's th’ best spoort in th’ wurruld, It's givin’ things to people.’ “But I can't,’ he says. ‘I haven't anny- thing to do it with,’ he says. ‘I don't know th’ game. I haven't anny gin'- he says. ‘But ye have,’ says they. ‘Ye have as much gin’rosity as anny wan if ye'll only use it,’ says they. ‘Take it out iv th’ plaster cast ye put it in an’ ‘twill look as good as new,’ says they. An’ he does it. He thries to use his gin’rosity, but all th’ life is out iv it. It gives way undher him an’ he falls down. He can’t raise it fr'm th’ ground. It's ossyfied an’ useless. I've seen 1093 AROUND THE WORLD by the palatial cruising steamship Cleveland 17,000 tons From New York - - Nov. 9, 1912 From San Francisco - Feb. 27,1913 WO days - $650 and up Including all necessary expenses aboard and ashore, railway, hotel, shore excur- sions, carriages, guides , fees, etc. Write for beautifully illustrated booklet containing full information. Summer Cruises To Land of the Midnight Sun NORWAY, NORTH CAPE, SPITZBERGEN 8 cruises from Hamburg during June, July and August. Duration from 14 to 16 days. Cost $62.50 up. By the large cruising ships Victoria Luise, Kronprinzessin Cecilie and Meteor. Vacation Cruises June to October JAMAICA Reund trip $75 PANAMA CANAL "9u"4 $115 By the Popular “Prinz” Steamers OF OUR ATLAS SERVICE Write for booklet of any cruise. HAMBURG - AMERICAN LINE — 41-45 Broadway, New York Bouse Pitnbureh St Louis Philadelphia Chicago comicbooks.com