Life, 1912-01-25 · page 30 of 44
Life — January 25, 1912 — page 30: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine (dated 1912, based on the Manhattan Life Insurance statement) is primarily a collection of **short humorous anecdotes** under "Signs of the Times," plus advertisements and financial notices. The jokes satirize **everyday absurdities**—poorly worded business signs, a pharmacist's logic, a pun about a young man "working his way through college" by being supported through his son's education, and a banker's solution to spelling difficulty (changing "Schenectady" to "Albany" because it's easier). The central cartoon is absent or unclear in this image, but the page features advertisements for **"Ye Olde Watchman" Whiskey** (marketed as tamper-proof) and personalized cigarettes, typical of 1912 consumer goods. The **financial statement** for Manhattan Life Insurance dominates the upper half—standard corporate advertising presenting assets and liabilities to build investor confidence during an era when insurance company solvency was a public concern. The humor throughout is gentle, observational satire targeting minor linguistic and social confusions of urban American life.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
EEE Signs of the Times Placard at a moving picture show: “Young children must have parenis” In a barber's shop window: “ During alterations patrons will be shaved in tne back.” Sign in a Tremont street store: mpty boxes—suitable for Christmas gifts.” In a tailor’s shop: “We dye for others, why not let us dye for you?” In a clothing store: “These pants will look better on your legs than on our hands.” A silversmith has a place next door to a restaurant. The former having put up a placard: “ Jewelry of all kinds plated," the restaurant keeper followed with this: “Oysters and Little Neck clams plated.” —Boston Transcript. Sufficient Reason for Refusal CuerK: I'm afraid I can’t let you have that drug, sir. Customer: Why not? Do I look like a man who would Kitt nimself? Currk: Well, I wouldn't go so far as to say that, sir; but if I looked like you I should ve tempted. —Boston Transcript. Papa's Job “What is Billy Hardatit doing these days?” asked Smithers. “Oh, he’s working his son's way through college,’ said little Binks. —Harper’s Weekly. ices: My half-brother is engaged to my wife's half-sister. Diccs: When will they be made one? —Boston Transcript. GREAT BEAR SPRING WATER 50 cents per case of 6 clase stoppered bottles 6st ANNUAL STATEMENT OF THE MANHATTAN LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY NEW YORK HENRY B. STOKES, ° Total Payments to Policyholders Since Organization Plus the Amount Now Held For Their Benefit $90,188,804.12 ADMITTED ASSETS JANUARY Ist, 1912 Bonds and Stocks owned by the Company . a Bonds and Mortgages, first lien (Fire Trstrace’ of on same e $69 966,383. 3.33) Real Estate owned by the Company Loans and Liens on Policies in force . Cash in Bank and on haad . . Net Deferred Premiums and Premiums in course of collection Interest and Rents due and accrued, and all other assets . . LIABILITIES Policy Reserve (as computed by the New York Insurance Department) . All other eh 4 AMOUNT TO PROVIDE FOR ANY POSBIGLE DEPRECIATION OR OTHER LIABILITY . se ee 2 25,000.00 AMOUNT weLo: Suavkor 30 continGencies, FoR’ SuAViVeR: ’ SHIP DIVIDEND wICIES . ee er ey of CONTINGENT RESERVE FUND |: > >) (7 fff sue nscantaiaisll $21,083,10854 Teta! lasurance in Force $68,630,595.00 Tetai Policy Reserve $19,156,577.00 Paid Policy-Holders During 1911, $2,187,362.68 Total Assets $21,983,103.54 Excess Assets Over Liabilities $2,339,236.67 President + — 289,886.53 $21,983,103.54 . $19,156,57.00 + 462/289.87 Near Enough A Chicago banker was dictating a let- ter to his stenographer. “Tell Mr. So- andso,” he ordered, “that I will meet him in Schenectady.” “How do you spell Schenectady?” asked the stenographer. “Sc, Sc—er—er—er— Tell him I'l meet him in Albany.”"—Argonaut Special ®2 Offer Good for 60 days only YOUR MONOGRAM ON 100 PRIVATE BRAND CIGARETTES We engrave your monogram {n gold on 109 chgarettesand send them prepaid for #2.—the usval peice for plain taitials, For socal aautbniness us. they ad cass nd istngton tthe! courtesies 1 lemade to quickly popularize Seritical smokers. Poey area, iad of highest grade Turks Dz. Witty is being mentioned for the Vice-Presidency, which bears out the theory that his enemies have not yet given up the fight against him. —Louisville Post. In a Pinch, use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE, ‘The Whiskey in the Non-Refillable Bottle -taken with some good mineral water is a stimulant of rare whclesomeness, The whiskey we refer to is “Watchman"’—one whose excellence is so remarkable by comparison with other good brands that it has been insured. takes the form of a Non-refillable, tamper-proof bottle. Ask for it—you'll be well repaid. “Ye Olde Watchinan’ Whiskey (In Non-refillable Bottles) insurance WALL STREET NOTE, THE CLOSING WAS FIRM Caront Bitters—Unequalled for flavoring sliced Fruits, Ices, and Jellies. Sample on receipt of 25 cents. ‘Oct. C. Blache & Co., 78 Broad St., N. Y.; Gen'l Distrs