Life — December 21, 1911 — page 39: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

portant, >wadays, son for <tremet We have caught the fragrance of r d 2c in stamps for THE ANDREW JERG! Going Some Mark Twain and Petroleum V. Nasby, says Donn Piatt, once dined with Eli Perkins at the latter’s residence in New York. The stories told and the rem- iniscences brought out at that dinner would fill a small book. After the last course, and after the ladies had withdrawn, the conversation turned upon horses. Finally Mr. Twain laid down his cigar and asked Perkins and Nasby if they had ever heard of a fast horse he (Mark) used to own in Nevada. I think not,” said Nasby. “Well, gentlemen,” continued Mr. Twain, as he blew a smoke ring and watched it, “that was a fast horse. He was a very fast horse. But he was so tough bitted that I couldn't guide him with a bit at all.” “ How did you guide him?” asked Eli. “Well, gentlemen, I had to guide with clec:ricity. I had to have wire lines and had to keep a battery in the wagon all the time in order to stop him.” “Why didn’t you stop him by holler- ing who-a?” asked Eli. “Stop him by hollering who-a!” ex- claimed Mr, Twain. “ Why, I could not holler loud cnough to make that horse hear me. He traveled so fast that no sound ever reached him from behind. He went faster than the sound, sir. Hol- ler who-a and he'd be in the next town before the sound of your voice could reach the dashboard. ‘Travel fast?’ I should say he could. Why I once started from Virginia City for Meadow Creck right in front of one of the most dread- ful rain storms we ever had on the Pa- cific Coast. Wind and rain? Why the wind blew eighty miles an hour and the -LIFE: 5 a DURING I9IO, 2.623.412 CHICLETS WERE SOLD EACH DAY > Ghiclets REALLY DELIGHTFUL Che Dainty Mint Covered Candp Coated Chewing Gum Strong in flavor, but not offensive. A delicate morsel, refreshing the mouth and throat and allaying after-dinner or after-smoking distress. The refinement cf chewing gum for people of refinement. It’s the peppermint—the (rue mint. For Sale at all the Better Sort of Stores 54 the Ounce and in 5¢.10¢ and 25¢ Packets ‘SEN-SEN CHICLET COMPANVarveonnvte toe rain fell in sheets. I drove right before that storm for three hours—just on the edge of that hurricane and rain for forty miles.” “Didn't you get drenched?” “*Drenched?’ No, Vhy, I tell you, I drove in front of that rainstorm. I could lean forward and Jet the sun . shine on me, or lean backward and fee The celebrated rain and catch hailstones. When the Jaeger Underwear is suit- hurricane slacked up the horse slacked able: alike for dien, women up, too, and when it blew faster I just zs said ‘g-lk!’ to the horse and touched and children, and for all con- the battery and away we went. Now, I ditions of health and occu- don’t want to lic about my hors pation. Recommended by Perkins, and I don't ask you to believe : 3 what I say, but I tell you truthfully that the Medical Profession when I got to Meadow Creek my linen everywhere. duster was dry as powder.” Library of Wit and Humor Explanatory catalogue and —By Eli Perkins, samples free on request Dr. Jaeger’s Nee ees There’s is the title of a beautifully illustrated) A Happy 80-page booklet with six complete) New Year maps descriptive of felighetul tours) For {eee Cia crcanecen| Everybody FRANK ROBERTS | Asmilele ovary bottle : ee food health in every glass General Passensse gent United | 4 tarrel containing 10 dozen bottles will S2Broadway Room 2i! New York | afford lasting pleasure comicbooks.com