Life — April 27, 1911 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“LIFE: Right to a Dot “T can tell you,” said he, “how much water runs over the } Falls t quart.” “How mucl “Two pints. —The Christian Advocate. Makes a Wonderful Difference "asked he. New Palace Steamers, L NIGHT SERVICE—Via FOLKESTON| air DAY SERVICE—Via QU EENBORO FIRS rs The Quickest a hat is an Nerthera aad Central Eur pe it three , had it blocked twice, IDE TRIPS THROU 1 it once for a new one at ah aay, York Call, ce KKER, General a oe Royal Ball Ros “Yes,” boasted an over-dressed indi- vidual. * in the look of your silverware when you clean itevery week with WrRiGHT’s SILVER (REAM Used by over a million American women. A perfect silver polish in paste form (not powder) as soft and smooth as cream and just as harmless to both your silver and your hands. Removes all dirt, dullness and discolorations from silver, gold and other metals—restores their original brightness, 38 years on the market. Be sure you get the genuine “Wright's Siber ream” from your dealer, A large sample jar sent for 6 cents (in stamps) J. A. WRIGHT & CO. 180 Court Street Keene, N. H. Much has been written about this staid little town of Beans and Brains, but nothing quite as joyous and illuminating as Funny Boston, by Rollin Lynde Hart. Writes Mr. Hart, “We derive rare glee from those who poke scorn at us from afar—Zife, for in- stance, and the New York Sun. Our street urchins quote Browning, do they? Our policemen converse in Greek! Our men _ wear Chesterfieldian When the late Tom Johnson started in life he drove a horse car in Indianapolis. One night there was a big storm of sleet and snow and the tracks were al- most hidden. Johnson was on the night shift, and in the storm be drove his car two blocks beyond a curve before he realized the car was off the tracks and slipping along on the ice. He tried to pull the car back and failed. Thereupon he unhitched the horses, drove them back to the barn and left the car where it was. Next day the superintendent called him, “Here, Johnson,” he do you mean by driving a car off the track and then leaving it in the street? “Why,” Johnson replied, suavely, “that's in the rules for drivers and con- OOK for this beautiful cover on the news-stands. There ductors.” “In the rules for drivers and con- ductors?” roared the superintendent. “ Where, I'd like to know?” “Certainly,” replied Johnson. “It says always to be polite to passengers. Do you remember the kind of a night last night was? Well, there was a lady on my car who didn’t have an umbrella and she lived two blocks from that curve. So I drove her home. —Saturday Evening Post. HARTSHORN SHADE ROLLERS Bear the script name of yrno tacks r Wood Rollers Tin Rollers are more good short stories under it than are usually found in one .number of any magazine. If you haven't read the Metropolitan recently you don't know what a good magazine you can buy for Sifteen cents. little gray shawls! Go on thinking so; the joke is on you. ‘I will’ is Chicago's motto. Ours is ‘Let's not.’”? In the May METROPOLITAN MAGAZINE Any News-stand 15 Cents a Copy comicbooks.com