Life — January 26, 1911 — page 32: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘AUT SCISSORS Aut NULLus Another Inducement A woman came to the advertisement office of a local newspaper a few days ago to insert a plea for a cook. “It's three lines, isn't it?” she asked, having some experience in advertising for domestics. said the clerk, counting care- It's over three lines, We'll have to charge you for four. But you can put in four more words if you wish.” The seeker after “help” paused a moment in deep thought. “Four more words,” she repeated, “four more words? Oh, I have it, Put in ‘police- man stationed opposite corner. —Philadelphia Times. Saiton: Just at that moment my LIGHT COMEDY CLOTHES father received a bullet that cut off both Her costumes are lovely, so rich and so chic his arms and legs and threw him into (You'd think that her courage might fail the sea, Fortunately, he knew how to Fourteen she will wear ‘ere the end of the ‘ : et swim—Le Rire, Just how she’s disguised as a sailor The Trouble With Her C Mary Garden, the singer, was in a box at the Metropolitan Opera House witnessing an operatic performavce on one of her off nights. A famous singer was singing, and Miss Garden was asked what she thought of her. “ She has a most superb figure,” replied Miss Garden. “Her bodice, though, is very décolleté, and her skirt is very short.” Then Miss Garden smiled and said: “In fact, her dress reminds me of these win- ter days we're having: it begins too late and it ends too early.”—Ladics’ Home Journal, A Pittsburgh Observation “What shall we say of Senator Smugg? " “Just say he was always faithful to his trust.” “And shall we mention the name of the trust? "—Pittsburgh Observer. Patten’s Secret “ Pluck,” said James Patten, the multi- millionaire food products’ plunger, of Chicago, “is the secret of success.” “Well,” interrupted a brother specu- lator, “I'l give you a thousand dollars if you'll teach me your method of phick- ing."—Human Life. Lire is published every ‘Thursday, simuitancously in the United States, Great Britain, Canada and Belling, Chancery Lane. 7 London, B.C. Eneland, Acmers. | Brentano's $7 Are. de British Possessions. $5.00 a year in advance, Additional postage to foreign countries in the Postal also at Saarbach's News Exchanges, 16 Joba St, Adeiphl, Strand, W C.. Londons 14 Union $1.04 a years to Canada, $2 cents. Single current copies, 10 cent. Back numbers, after three Fauboarg, St Denis, Paris: 1, Via Gustavo Modena, Milan: Mayence, Germany months from date of publication. 25 cents. ‘No contribution tl be reiurned unless accompanied by stamped and addressed enselope tava ,, ThE text and illustsations in Lave are copsrithted. For Reprint Rights in Grest Britain apy does not hold itself responsible jor the loss or non-return of unsolicited contributions, to Live 114 Southampton Row, London, Livz 3 for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain, The International News Company, Breams Promps notification should sent by subscribers of any change of address. J. & F. MARTELL A Valentine Suggestion Cognac Corr 3904 by Lite Pantene On (Founded 1715) AND FINE OLD LIQUEUR BRANDIES GENUINE OLD BRANDIES MADE FROM WINE OF THE cocnac ff 7 | A Heart Full of Affection DISTRICT — 7 9 Photogravure, mounted 15 x 20, $1.00 Sole Agents Sent, carriage prepaid, to any address G.S. NICHOLAS & CO. New York upon receipt of $1. Life Publishing Co., 17 West 31st Street, New York Pat, Ree R (By # Perch: To What Am comicbooks.com