Life, 1910-12-29 · page 7 of 41
Life — December 29, 1910 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes the final days of the American Republic through an auction scenario. An auctioneer attempts to sell off the entire United States—"the whole thing"—to the highest bidder, offering everything from "hotels, cities, farms, legislatures, school-systems" to New York City specifically. The satire mocks the idea that America could be bought and sold like property. A song-writer bids on "the whole collection of human interests," suggesting artistic and cultural value were being commodified. The accompanying cartoon "R-R-Revenge!" depicts a debutante getting revenge on an old businessman (soap maker) by selling his Roman Bath advertisement to his rival for money, illustrating how personal vendettas could emerge in a commercialized society. The overall message critiques American materialism and the reduction of national ideals to mere transactions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Coming, Coming— [ was the last day of the American Republic. The red flag had been out and all the nations of the earth were as- sembled to bid on the proceeds. The auctioneer stepped nimbly to his rostrum. “Now, ladies and gentlemen,” he be- gan, “this is an unreserved sale. Every- thing will be knocked down to the highest bidder without exception. Prices do not include delivery. Are you ready, gentle- men?” The first lot was put up. “Now, here we have,” said the auc- tioneer, Standard Oil Company com- pletely equipped—the greatest system in the world. How much am I offered?” No reply. “How much am I offered, gentlemen? Will some one make a bid? Say five marks. No? Take down the lot, John- ny, we will try it again. . . . Now, gentlemen, here's a city, completely ready for inhabitants—the most re- nowned city in the world. Start your bids, gentlemen, for the metropolis, the great New York. It is badly damaged, but capable of much wear yet. How much am I offered?” No reply. “How much am I offered, gentlemen, Happy New Year for this superb collection of stone and brick, with a harbor that is unexcelled? Will some one bid a shilling? No? Take it down, Johnny, and we'll try something else. . . . Gentlemen, here is one chance in a million The lot I am offering you has never been put up before. A wonderful collection of woman's clubs, with every modern im- provement. Will some one bid? What! No bids? I tell you this great sale can- not go on unless——" At this moment an individual pushed himself forward. “Tl make you an cffer for the whole thing,” he said. “You mean everything here?” “That's what I mean. The whole United States of America, with every- thing it contains, just as it was the day it was abandoned—hotels, cities, ferms, legislatures, school-systems—the whole thing.” The auctioneer paused. that the sale must be made. demur. “What do you bid?” he whispered. “A song.” “A song?" He realized His not to I am a_ song-writer, and latest song for the whole “Yes. 1 bid my thing. “Gentlemen, are bids?” No reply. “Gentlemen, this is a slaughter. Iam bid a song for this grand collection of human interests, A song, once! A song, twice! Going, goin Take it away, at your wn expense—it’s yours!” The song-man paused. “I came in late,” he “Don't you deliver?” “No, sir, The terms were distinctly stated. You must take it away.’ And the song-man muttered: “ Robbed!” R-R-Revenge! E find the artist gritting his teeth and clenching his fists, while he addresses sulphurous remarks to the air. “What is it?” we ask. “Old man Grizzum, the soap maker, was in here this morning, and had the effrontery to offer me only a hundred dollars for my painting of The Roman Bath, " “But it isn’t here any more. dently you let him have it.” “Not on your life! I got revenge on the stupid old numbskull. I sold it to his advertising manager for two thou- there any other stammered, Evi- AY Y i AT il ey rer THE pisu comicbooks.com