Life — November 10, 1910 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

«LT PE + Mattecming — Koun Nes Sia Bex Still After the Ultimate Life’s Two Millions Reward for Its Capture Not Yet Handed Out T was natural that we should have rival claimants. The New York ning Journal, in a leading editorial, now claims to have discovered the Ultimate. It is going to dis- tribute it piecemeal among its readers. See comic supple- ment. Also this, from the Herald: “The Herald, not to be outdone in enterprise, yesterday captured the Ultimate. The story of its finding and some of the thrilling escapes our reporters had, will be given in cigh- teen installments, every other day. Also a picture of the Ultimate will be exhibited suitable for framing. The Herald’s position as the leading Ultimate finder will now be recog- nized. In order to secure it, Mr. Bennett was obliged to dis- charge every member of his staff, some of whom had been with him for several months and had families to support. But his fine sense of honor with regard to the Ultimate left him no other course. Buy the Herald.’” Also, from the Outlook: “We have had the Ultimate all along in this office. Does any one suppose that Dr. Abbott should have been writing editorials about it for all these years without having it where he could lay his hands on it? Never! We wouldn’t part with it, however, for a paltry two millions, It has been our mainstay. We depend upon it now almost entirely to get our paper out. When we have written up immortality and the spiritual side of things we furn to our tried and trusty Ultimate, and it never fails us.’” Now, Lire has no quarrel with these, or any other esteemed contemporaries, who claim to have the Ultimate concealed about their persons. We only say that it is very selfish of them to keep it to themselves. Our purpose is purely patriotic. Immediately upon its receipt we will pay two millions and turn it over to the coun- try at large, where it will do the most good. Hoboken.—Your correspondent here is now on the track of the Ultimate, which is believed to be in hiding in this city. It was seen yesterday coming out of the Hoboken ferry, presumably on its way to the Woman’s Club of Orange, but later it came running back with its tail between its legs. 1 hope to report favorably. Waldorf Hotel, N. Y.—The Ultimate is said to be staying here. Several suffragettes have seen it. Mrs. Belmont de- clares that she had it yesterday, but it got away. It is very imposing and has a fair and very impressive elocution. You would know it anywhere. No one can mistake it. Central Park.—At nine o'clock last night the Ultimate was seen skulking through this region, looking very much ashamed of itself. It is understood that it had been attending some civic alliance meeting. A long chase ensued, but it got away, having disappeared in the wilds of Harlem. The police have been notified. Brooklyn,—Officers of the Brooklyn Rapid Transit claim that they had the Ultimate in their grasp yesterday. They need the reward badly to pay their next dividend and brokers’ commissions. But it eluded them at the important moment and hid in the cellar of the ice trust, where it was frozen out. We still hope for the best. Hazleton, Pa—President Baer, of the coal trust, reports having the Ultimate here yesterday. He kept it confined, but it got through the window in the night. It was disguised as an Ultimate Consumer, and it is feared it will get away and elude the authorities. In the meantime, Lrg is waiting to pay that reward. Any one handing in the Ultimate at this office will get two mil- lions in hard money. Fault! Fault! Judge Packard, of Maryland, faulted the proposal for its use of language.—Episcopal Convention report in Boston Transcript. A ND we hereby respectfully fault the Transcript for the same reason. What on earth does “ fault the proposal '’ mean? Why on earth does the Transcript permit itself to use such language? comicbooks.com