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Life, 1910-09-08 · page 19 of 40

Life — September 8, 1910 — page 19: what you’re looking at

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Life — September 8, 1910 — page 19: Life, 1910-09-08

What you’re looking at

This page features "Life's Infallible Fortune Teller," a satirical horoscope-style section pairing birth dates (September 8-14) with absurdist predictions about future spouses and marriages. The humor operates through **exaggerated stereotypes and domestic complaints**. Women born on these dates receive husbands described with petty flaws: a "flower-painter" who's poor, a "society butterfly" wastrel, a "missionary" who'll die in obscurity. Men get wives with comic vices: a blonde who smokes and talks in her sleep, one prone to "family rows" over haircuts, a nun-turned-burlesque performer. The satire targets **early 20th-century gender anxiety and marriage disappointment**—the joke being that no matter your birth date, matrimony promises compromise, financial strain, and domestic tedium. It mocks both fortune-telling's pretensions and the resigned cynicism many held about marriage itself. The left column contains unrelated poetry and a serious article about restoring New York City Hall.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

To tell them what a bully time he had! "* Then came a burst of discord! “ ‘Tis a Hop, The Angel glide” T mu said; “Then let us also ured softly; “ Waltz us round again, And beat all speed tests in our rush. for town! “Not yet."’ the Angel threatened shall view “You The mountain boardirg-house upon the peaks No horror you have scen can equal this, Then there is camp life underneath the tents here it rains steady through the happy days And all the livelong night it also rains; xreat Outdoors from The simple living in A hundred thousand where !* miles any- Enough!" the Poet whimpered, at his knee. * Beyond I see the city steeples glow ike welcome hearthstones beckoning us home, Steer us to those fair temples!" At the word Angel's eyes grew sweeter. smile With He pushed the needle to the highest ch pinning on and up with sails all set quarricd through a citadel of id issuing thence again beheld the stars, Kate Masterson. The City Hall and Its Park {GH PRESIDENT McANENY s restored to their original state s he occupies in the City Hall the Governor's rooms were beautifully restored two years ago at the cost of Mrs. Sage, and the whole building prom- ses soon to be brought back to the state in which the architect originally left is fine in itself, and fine also as z sptom of increasing intelligence in ar civic administration. There is City Hall Park m ly be restored to its orig dition—the post-office torn down, Tweed court-house razed and necessary new buildings put up on a suitable scale, ing on Chambers Street, to be a did background to the little park. These ¢ whol changes would cost money, but they would be worth while. We have the men who can plan them beautifully and carry the plans out honestly. What 1 marvellous change that is for New York! = LEA Life’s Infallible Fortune Teller é ~~ If you were born on “6 Your future wife will bea rich blond addicted to cigar- ette smoking and talking in her sleep. Your future husband 42 will be a flower: painter who will Sept. 8 you're a da If you were born on “SY Your fuire wile will be soulful and intense, There will be a family row every you get your hair cut. ‘Your future husband 46 will be parsimoni- Sept. oy ona yo 9 Jearn how the hous If you were born on 8 Your future wife will be devout and very charitable. You will be obliged to keep your other suit of clothes in your safe deposit box. Your future husband #0 will be a society butterfly and you Sept. the 10 that you also were not born with a de- regret ficiency in the brain departy If you were born on “Ga Your future wile will have a devoted mother and you will be very much at home at your club, Your future husband #2 will be an English Sept. eh 3 you ‘tit 11 bom the care of patent expert in leather boots. If you were born on “68 Your future wile will be an escaped nun with a leaning toward a career in burlesque. Your future husband #4* s will be a missionary to the Cannibal ePte te satts'and you mill never be able to put 12 flowers on his grave except in the for boutonniere, It you were born on “GB Your future wile will be active in club politics. A hot dinner will be a rarity in your house- b Your future husband 28° will at first be in- clined to criticize Sept. our hats. After he 130 ius linery bills get over thi da few mil- If you were born cn “GB Your future wile will be a sensible and brave woman who will refuse to wear bodices that button in back and will die young. Your future husband 42 will be an Italian Sept 14 times a day comicbooks.com