Life, 1910-06-23 · page 38 of 40
Life — June 23, 1910 — page 38: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes early 20th-century anxieties about **germ theory and food safety**. The main content consists of two related pieces: **"Soliloquy"** parodies Hamlet's existential monologue, replacing life-or-death questions with obsessive concerns about germs in food and drink. The satire targets the era's emerging "health consciousness"—people paralyzed by conflicting dietary advice (vegetarians vs. meat-eaters, sterilization advocates vs. traditionalists). The joke: modern hygiene obsession leaves nothing safe to eat except buttermilk and rice. **The poem above** similarly mocks germophobia, imagining someone preferring their ancestors' simpler diet and "old-fashioned orthodox disease" to constant sterilization anxiety. The **advertisements** (Florida Water perfume, cigarettes) represent period marketing that exploited these health fears. This reflects genuine early-1900s anxieties following Pasteur's discoveries about bacteria, but *Life* magazine ridicules the neurotic excess this knowledge produced—a common satirical theme of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE RAYLANNA FLORIDA WATER Ah, who would stand eternally on guard Against the germ that lurks in every kiss, In every cup, in every breath of air, When he might easily escape from this With a bare bodkin, duly sterilized, But for the paralyzing, awful fear Of meeting after death the souls of germs That he has slaughtered in cold blood down here? Perchance I err, but oft it seems to me That 1 would gladly give up my Near- Tea, Near-Coffee and the latest breakfast foods To live as all my ancestors have lived On pork and pickles, apple pie and cheese; To die as all my ancestors have died Of some old-fashioned orthodox disease, And, if the idea strikes my aged head, I may die on a nice fat featherbed. A Toilet Treasure In certain reckless, atavistic moods —Nautilus, LIFE’S PRINTS A Welcome Gift For 25 cents we will send you the pocket edition of LIFE'S PRINTS. It contains 160 reproductions, in sizes here shown, of these most artistic and pleasure-giving pictures. Without exception the best and most popular Toilet Perfume made IX the Bath it is cooling and reviving; on the Handkerchief and for general Toilet use it is delightful ; after Shaving itis simply the very best thing to use. Copyright 1908 Life Poblishing Company Soliloquy To be killed, or scared to death; that is the question. Whether ‘tis better to grow fat than thin, Better to cat your bread and drink your —tea, Unmindful of the germs that lurk therein, Or to take arms against the bacteria horde, To sterilize, to Pasteurize, to boil, to chew, To chew—and by much chewing end The stomach-ache and all aches, not a few, That flesh is heir to. tion Devoutly to be wished. Chewing is good, But what is good to chew? Ay, there's the rub. We must not chew adulterated food, And what is pure? The vegetarian Says, “ Naught with eyes is proper food for man." Alas for all the habits of the race! Meat and potatoes fall beneath this ban. “ Proteids are poison y A, B and C. “The conquering races cat ‘em,’ an- swers Z. Says You quite forget the Japanese. Thus everlastingly they disagree, Argue, assert, question and criticise, Till naught is left to eat that’s really nice, Except, for those who like it, buttermilk, And for a treat, occasionally, rice. “WON'T BE NOTHIN’ LEFT O° THEM THINGS AFTER FusT STORM Photogravure, 16x 13 50 cents “Tis a consumma: Copyright 1910 Life Publishing Company Life Patiiabing Company HOME THES Facsimile in Color, 14 x 17 in. $1.00 SHOULD AULD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT? Facsimile in Color, Mounted, 14x17 in. $1.00 LIFE PUBLISHING COMPANY, 17 West 31s St, NEW YORK Frain ot cork tion se oon Hp £. toftman Company, Mfrs. 179 Madison St.. Chicago comicbooks.com