Life, 1910-04-07 · page 33 of 76
Life — April 7, 1910 — page 33: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces mocking early 20th-century American vanity and materialism. **"Culture in the Home"** (poem by H.H. Matteson) humorously depicts a family obsessed with physical appearance—the mother doing exercise routines, the father trying hair-loss remedies, and sisters performing acrobatic stunts to maintain slim figures. The satire targets the era's commercialized beauty industry and the absurd lengths people go to for self-improvement. **"Cash"** presents a dialogue at a social gathering where hosts and guests discuss only money and possessions—the cost of cars, gowns, home renovations. The satire criticizes American materialism, suggesting that character has been replaced by net worth as society's measure of a person. The guest's final suggestion—posting an itemized account of expenses in the foyer—represents the absurd endpoint of this values system. **"A Waiting Policy"** (brief joke) satirizes the social obligation to admire newly acquired possessions, suggesting people avoid visiting until the novelty wears off. Together, these pieces critique consumerism, vanity, and the shallow values dominating American society.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“IN THE SPRING Culture in the Home OTHER says that it is foolish To grow wrinkled, old and gray, To accumulate obesity is wrong; She contorts upon the carpet Every morn at break of day, Rolling thus, she’s read, reduces “em- bong-pong.”” Ev'ry brand of paste and lotion, Forty kinds of germicide, Which will slay the bug of baldness in its lair, These my poor old frantic father Pertinaciously has tried To rejuvenate a sickly patch of hair. My two sisters—acrobatic— Do their stunts with circus vim; Tho’ I'm not so sure they'd care to have you there. But they keep their figures graceful, And their waist lines trim and slim, Just by standing on their heads beside a chair. H. H. Matteson. MGB FRCDONALL 4.10 YOUNG MAN'S FANCY LIGHTLY TURNS TO THOUGHTS OF LOVE.’’ Cash in America, when one meets any one new, one never asks ‘What is his charac- ter?” but, ‘How much is he worth?’ Current sitticism, N accordance with the above, and in lieu of the spread of our commercial instincts, we shall doubtless soon have ns like the following : : A Week End Party. guest has just arrived. The greets him effusively. Awfully good of you to ask me. Delighted, I am sure : Came over in your new car. up for about four thousand. Hostess: Cost five hundred more than that, with the fixings. Show you the bill if you like. Guest: Oh, never mind gown you have on Hostess (anticipating him): Glad you like it. Two hunderd, at Babster’s. Is that one of Pell’s ninety dollar sack suits? A new hostess Stunning Guest: No. enty-five dollar. Hostess: I declare, they are improv- ing. Have had your room done over. You'll like it better. Cost eighty dol- lars, but was worth it. Gurst: Say! I have an idea. Hostess: Yes? Gurst: Why not have your secretary turn out an itemized account of all your One of Bampton’s sev- expenses this season, with a statement of your assets, and put it in the front hall? That will give us all more time to dis- cuss the races and bridge. Hostess : Capital. Hurrics away to carry it out. A Waiting Policy HEN are you coming out to spend Sunday with us?"? “Just as soon as you have gotten so used to your new house that you don’t feel impelled to show it to anybody.”” ounce of prevention is worth a pound of the big stick. comicbooks.com