Life, 1910-03-03 · page 20 of 80
Life — March 3, 1910 — page 20: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces mocking American institutions and politics: **"Benevolent!"** attacks the S.P.C.A. (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) for hypocrisy—the organization endorses vivisection (animal experimentation) while soliciting donations as a "benevolent" charity. The satire questions how donors can continue supporting an organization that causes animal suffering. **"Famous Quotations from American Politics"** is a scathing compilation of cynical, invented "quotes" parodying American politicians' corruption. Phrases like "Public office is a private steal" and "Millions for revenue, every cent for the politicians" mock widespread graft and embezzlement in government. **"Only Fair"** is a brief comedic exchange about life insurance, where an overweight applicant proposes the insurance company insure only half of him. The page reflects early-20th-century Progressive Era concerns: animal welfare, government corruption, and institutional hypocrisy. The humor relies on readers' frustration with perceived widespread dishonesty in public life.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Benevolent ! E read on the back of the S. P. C. A. “ Bulle- tin’: Those who may feel disposed to donate, by will or otherwise, to the benevolent objects of the Society, etc. “Benevolent objects’ is amusing. Now that the society indorses vivisection, what is the public to un- derstand by “ benevolent "’? When this S. P. C. A. rescues a lame horse is it going to send the horse to the vivisectors, for agonies compared with which any possible lameness would be a celestial joy? Do the officers of this society believe that lovers of animals are so simple as to con- tinue their donations? Famous Quotations from American Politics “T IBERTY and Graft, now and forever, one and insep- arable.”” ‘d rather have the boodle than be President.”” “Where did you get it?" “Give me graft or give me death.” “With malice toward none, with an appropriation for all.’* “ Public office is a private steal.”’ ) you Ananias.”* “First in bluff, first in gulf, first in the pockets of their countrymen.”" “ Millions for revenue, every cent for the politicians. “ Shake the plum tree “Search me; I'm immune. “Let us have—the pieces."’ “Let no guilty man escape; but catch him first.” “To the trusts belong the people.’” “Office for the revenue only; we're not here for our health "* “The square steal, or honest graft."” “Corrupt and discontented ; there is money still left in the treasury.”’ “Never touched me; look for the man lower down." “ Protection for the police; they need the money.”” Cc. W. Lucas. Only Fair “W shall have to reject your application for life insur- nce,"” says the agent. “T'd like to know why,” “Well, the examining phys replies the applicant. jan says you are t as you should be.’? “All right. I'l be fair. You insure half of me and I'll let the other half take its chances."* Jack Says HERE are ninety and nine ways of getting rid of a chaperon and every single one of them is right. That there are a good many people who have the wolf at their door, only they've coaxed him round to the back. That there are three kinds of literature—prose, poetry and love letters. That if a man is really in love with a girl he €an’t quite believe that she loves him. That every good husband is only a lover in disguise. That it's more sinful to be stupid than to be wicked. That a very big secret can get out of a very little mouth Ethel Claire. To Help the Man Who Has Not “Made Good” Young Men's Christian Association Inaugurates Course to Establish Self-Confidence —Newspaper Heading. GOOD course, no doubt, and probably compact of wise suggestion. Why not send a copy of the circular about it to “W. H. T., White House, Washington, D. C.''? A PRESENT TO PAPA comicbooks.com