Life — January 20, 1910 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

132 Joys of Agony HE horror and Indignation aroused by recent disclosures in the New York Herald of goings on at Mr. Rocke- feller’s institute ought to produce re- sults, That such atrocities should be permitted, even in an uncivilized com- munity, would be bad enough. The monkey who, after many tortures, died of fright at the prospect of another “experiment,” gives some idea of the amusements in those Halls of Agony. As for the men themselves, the “in- vestigators,"" it is perhaps charitable to regard them as degenerates of a well- recognized type. Theirs is the lust of cruclty—ingenious, persistent, insatiable cruelty. The almost unanimous support of vivi- section by doctors has done as much to injure the medical profession as any other simple cause. A host of eminent physicians, both in Europe and America, have long since realized the futility of these wholesale orgies of torture. Dis- case giving serums no longer charm We have heard too many tales of cures for cancer, tuberculosis, spinal menin- gitis and other ills. The diseases them- selves are as active as ever. Tubercu- losis, in fact, since the serum idea {s in practice has vastly increased. APRICAN SOUVENIR BULLET HUNTERS Life’s Handy Divorce Pro- ceedings OR those who haven't time to read all the divorce details constantly being published in the daily papers Lire submits a handy form of such proceed- ings. All divorce proceedings in high life are alike, and the essential features are here given: Mrs. John Doe is suing her husband for a divorce or separation, or he is suing her. It makes no difference. Doe’s father was a millionaire. Doe has never worked—except his friends. Mrs. John Doe appears on the stand. She is dressed very simply in a million- dollar costume imported from Paris. No one would know to look at her that she ever drank a drop. She parries the questions of the lawyer wonderfully. “What is this item of four quarts of champagne and two bottles of cocktails delivered t8 your room at four o'clock In the morning, Mrs. Doe? "? “That was for my dog Fido. severe headaches.” “You never take anything yourself? ’” “ Nothing to speak of. “Tell about your first meeting with your husband,” “ He was very drunk at the time.’” “And you married him?” “T thought he would get over it.”” How much money did you spend on you wedding trip?" “Not more than a million. Oh, it may have been a million and a half—I don't remember the details.”” “ Husband ever strike you? ”* “Oh, yes. That was his amusement.’” Mr. John Doe is then called. He has favorite He re- fuses to testify against his wife—on ad- vice from his lawyer. His friends are then called and ex- plain that they never saw him drink a drop in their lives—except possibly once. Servants are then called. Following testimony with butler: “You have lived with John Doe and his wife?’ Yes, ver saw them drunk?’ Never saw them anything else.”’ “What do you mean by drunk?’" “ Staggering round—unable to stand up—throwing things at each other— calling bad names—constant hell.” TW (( YE, SS OWED TO THE HOME DYER (With apologies to Thomas Baily Aldrich.) Somewhere in desolate, wind-swept street, In Noman's Land, in Woman's Land, Two hurrying shapes stood still to greet And bade each other stand, “ And who are you?.” cried one, agape, Gazing on the dazzling sight. “T hardly know,” said the other shape, “T only dyed last night.” comicbooks.com