Life — August 12, 1909 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

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THE NEW CAN —It’s Sealed PANHARD OIL “The Oil in the Checker-Board Can" enables your engine to develop its full power and speed. You can keep your car jvut of the repair shops by using Panhard O Panhard Oil is a sinadard of quality. Tri is used by motorists who appreciate that the “ best is the Cheapest.” Our booklet ‘* Lubrication ”’ will aid you in selecting the grade of Panhard best suited to your car. GEORGE A. HAWS 86 Pine Street New York City ; You Selected inquired little Waldo Bunker, of Boston, who was spending the winter in Florida, “ Mawa,’” “what is that body of water?’’ “The Atlantic ocean, my dear.” “The Atlantic ocean!” ex- claimed little Waldo, in amazement.“ Why, I thought the Atlantic ocean was near Boston !""— Master, Mate, and Pilot. Ap thus spoke Sewell Ford: Tt was a dark night. A man was riding a bicycle with no lamp. He came to a crossroads, and did not know which way to turn. He felt in his pocket for a match. He found but one. Climbing to the top of the pole, he lit the match carefully and in the ensuing glimmer read: Wer Paixt erybody’s. “Ina pinch use Allen's Foot-Ease.”” remarked the tramp, ashe threw a package of white powder into the eyes of the po- jiceman who was about to arrest him.— The Harvard Lampoon. Her Leap Year Proposal “You've been courting me now for a number of years, George,” remarked a girl to a young man, “and I want to make a little leap-year pro- posal.’* “IT am not in a position to m-marry just ered the youth; but ”"— “Who said anything about marriage?” rupted the girl you stop coming here a chance.”"—Philadelphia inter- ing to propose that ve somebody else a rer, Apodictic “Tam determined to go on a vacation! "" Whittler looked almost fierce as he spoke. Cleverton regarded him with a quizzical look “You have a comfortable home?" he asked plendid. Nothing could be better.” And a loving wife?” None more so. Studies to please all Never obtrudes herself, and is able. You are in good physical condition? "* “Very. Never felt better.’’ Xo trouble of any sort, no hidden worry that you want to get away from?" “None whatever. Everything is serene.” “ What, then, is the reason for your going?” Whittler smiled. “My dear boy,” he replied, “don't you know that when everything is running smoothly, when there is absolutely no cause for complaint, when you simply couldn't improve on the present con- ditions if you tried—don't you understand that then the pure and unadulterated cussedness of human nature absolutely demands that some- thing be done to upset the harmony of things? That's why I am going on a vacation. I’m look- ing for trouble !"—Lippincott’s. the ilent when soGREAT, BEAR SPRING WATER, 50 cents per case of 6 giass stoppered bottles 222 For Sale Everywhere. W. A. TAYLOR & CO., Sole Agents New York. The Latest Books Damien lokai, Poems, by Wilbur Underwood. (Elkin Matthews, 2 shillings 6 pence, net.) Some Hidden Sources of Fiction, by B. M. (Geo, W. 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