Life — May 27, 1909 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

~ Healthfulness is the most vital of the rea- sons for using a natural sparkling table water in pref- erence to waters charged with manu- factured carbonic acid gas. Vv erriep y . *¢ Chamsosne of 1abte WO" too, is more delicate, satis- fying and invigorating alone or with your whiskey. ‘LIFE: | Sparkling Table PERRIER, Grocers Chobe Wine Merchants Hotels ‘SSMMRRLETUN DEL De ee ee oe “GOR FOOLISH ‘@NTEMPORA One Look Was Enough When President Taft was at Augusta, C fore his inauguration, he drove out one the plantation of a friend. The old mammy who did the cooking paid no attention to the distinguished guest. She took one look at him and went back to the kitchen “Liza,” said the planter, after Mr. Taft had what did you think of that gentleman?” “T didn’t think nothin’ ‘bout him, i “‘eept he looked like he would be ri meals.”—Saturday Evening Post. A PEP AT PERFEGTION Mrs, Bird; a FirteEN POUNDER. WON'T PAPA br vroup! One Kind of Husband Lady Arthur Paget, at a dinner in New York, said of the “ appalling American divorce habit "— for that is the shape which our divorce question And deceit, petty deceit, grave deceit—that other frequent cause of divorce. “Too many husbands are like the one who said, as his servant helped him on with his over- coat: “*James, if my wife asks you where I am, tell her I've gone to the opera.’ “The man bowed. “Yes, sir; very good, sir.’ And he added im- perturbably, ‘And where are you really going, sir, in case _any of your friends should call or ring you up?’ "—Detroit Free Press. GREAT BEAR SPRING WATER 50 cents per case of 6 Elass stoppered bottles Be Rank But the Guinea’s Stamp While ex-President Roosevelt was on his fa mous Louisiana bear-hunting trip he passed by ar old colored man’s cabin and saw two fine hounds in the yard. Mr. Roosevelt made several offers for the hounds, each larger than the last; but the old man shook his head. Finally the Presi dent. said “If you knew who I am you would sell me those dogs.” Sell you dem houn’ dawgs if I knowed you is!” exclaimed the man. “ Who is you, any how?” , “Tam President Roosevelt,” was the reply, uttered in an impressive tone rhe old man looked at him a moment, and then heak, I wouldn’t care if you was Books ashington—you couldn't get dem dawgs! Woman's Home Companion. 1 four-season resort of the nglish-like Inn of Asheville A Last Farewell time rude and polite is an difficulty. A writer in the Philadelphia Ledger tells of a French gentleman who had finished his holiday in England, and had just paid a ver hotel bill. He was indig- nant, but his native courtesy was unimpaired, end ze proprictaire to me,” he said to the waiter, and presently the host entered. Monsicur was all smiles. Ah, let me embrace you!” he cried. But why do you want to embrace me, sit? I don’t understand. “Ah, saire, but look at zee bee “Your bill! Yes, but what of it “Vot of it? Vy, it means zat I s’all_nevaire, nevaire see you again, saire.”—Youth’s Com _ Asneyitie, No Co: South. Tied A Delicate Hint Sandy and his lass had been sitting together an hour in silence id, at length, “ wasna I here on > I daur say you were.” on Monday nicht?” é here on Tuesday nicht, an’ Wednes- day nicht, an’ Thursday nicht, an’ Friday nicht?” “Aye, I'm thinkin’ that’s so. “An’ this is Saturday nicht, an’ I'm here “Well, what for, no? I’m sure ye're very wel- come.” andy (desperately) : Maggie, woman! D'e no begin to smell a rat!—Success Magazine. He Approved Three-year-old Tim had admired the clouds for a long time, but never thought to into their origin until a few evenings His mother explained at length how God the rain fall on the earth and then took it b: imo the sky, to all of which Tim listened at- tentively, and then patronizingly observed “Pretty dood stunt for Dod, isn’t it?”— Harper's Magazine. Wisdom. As your teeth are wanted to last—for time to come— begin at once their daily antiseptic cleansing with Calvert's Carbolic Tooth Powder. Price from and booklet from Park & ‘Tilord gay Bros ¥ pit Maken? FC, 2 Can, Banc Canadian Depot : 349 Dorchester Street West, Monit comicbooks.com