Life — April 29, 1909 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

588 Complaint of the Convalescent HEN you're sick in bed of something, And hate the sight of food; When the tinkle of a teaspoon Is torture to your mood; Nurse will come to you at intervals That h length ; And it's, 1, now, quickly, For you must keep up your strength.”* But when you're really better, And your appetite is fine; When your chief and only longing Is substantially to dine, Nurse will bring you something sloppy After ages, ages long And it’s, “Just a little, slowly, For you know you are not strong.”* Oh, it may be she's an angel— I have thought she was, myself; But now I am so hungry. Is there nothing on the shelf? I want some cheese and crackers, Or a slice of cold mince pie; And it’s, “You may have some jelly, Lemon jelly, by and by. —Geraldine Meyrick. The “New” Digestion HE “new ’’ digestion is following closely upon the heels of the new thought. One may travel to the ends of the wide world with a stomach full of buckwheat cakes and sausages; one may experience the fullest measure of spiritual inspira- tion on cold cabbage and ice cream; one may listen to music without distress immediately after a welsh rarebit and a broiled lobster. The secret is simple. One must be fearless. The slightest gestion of timidity, the slightest hesitancy in selection, remotest glimmering of caution, will be followed by unhappy results, in proportion to the fear of the consequences the victim has expressed. There is an old admonition, “ Be bold, but not too bold.” This does not apply 1 the “ new" digestion. It has been re- Be bold; you cannot be bold enough.”* On arising in the morning it is possible that your thoughts vised now to read, may turn to molasses candy; s is what your subliminal self demands, your psychic consciousness insists upon. If the desire at first is faint this is only because through long generations of mental slavery your natural inclinations have been buried under conventions. Encourage this desire for molasses candy, let the first faint glimmerings of an awaken- ing freedom be rewarded, and your soul—also your stomach— will begin to smile through the clouds. Molasses candy at "LIFE SO YOU'RE FEELING PERFECTLY WELL AGAIN, AND NEVER TOUCHED THE MEDICINE I GAVE YOU, EH? YOU MADE A GRAVE. MISTAKE, MRS. TIDBS, A GRAVE MISTAKE.”” “now so, pocror? '* “WHY, IF YOU'D TAKEN MY MEDICINE, YOU'D HAVE KNOWN WHAT CURED YOU, AND AS IT 18, YOU MAVEN’T THE LEAST IDEA.’ seven o'clock craving for. And remember that in proportion as you succeed in throw- ing off the fetters, and establishing a gastric freedom, will the book you are going to write about it sell, Therefore, eat, drink and be merry, for to-morrow you will begin collecting royalties. instead of oatmeal, is what you have been Socialism Illustrated I the game called Montana the purpose is to get rid of your cards by piling them on the aces. When each player piles all his cards, as sometimes happens, everybody succeeds per- fectly, but there is no score. “An exact illustration of per- fected socialism,’’ Macpherson calls that. Each player has worked strenuously in active competition, and has had all the fun of that, but has nothing to show for it. Isn't Macpherson right? Doesn't the socialistic plan seck to provide that everybody shall have the fun of living, but that nobody shall score? Rather Disconcerting “] ADIES and gentlemen,’* says the chairman of the meet- ing that has been called to hear a lecture on the mental healing of disease, “instead of being addressed by Mr. Thinkitt Owte, as was announced, we shall have the pleasure of listen- ing to Mr. Heelin Thott, who comes as a substitute for Mr. Owte, who is suddenly attacked by indigestion, and asks the silent waves of those present.’” comicbooks.com