Life, 1909-04-01 · page 31 of 52
Life — April 1, 1909 — page 31: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two sections: a cartoon captioning joke at the top, and a short story below. The **top cartoon** shows seven men in formal dress discussing new shoes. "Old Mr. Skadds" explains he's hired these fellows specifically to break in (stretch) his new tight shoes—a crude joke about using hired labor for personal convenience. **The story** satirizes the tension between courtship propriety and parental parsimony. Jonas Wetherly seeks to propose to Mabel Webbe but she fears her father's reaction—not from disapproval of Jonas, but because papa is extremely economical. The satire's point: the father is so stingy he avoids spending money, yet his social position demands he host an expensive wedding. Mabel and her mother have been strategizing how to approach him about the inevitable cost. The humor lies in the awkward contradiction between maintaining respectable appearances and the father's miserly nature—a common anxiety of the middle-class household.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Old Mr. Skadds: pixcu? or couRSE THEY PINCH! IF THEY WEREN’T NEW AND TIGHT, WHY WOULD I BE HIRIN’ YOU FELLOWS TO BREAK ‘EM IN? A Business Affair “T)O you think I ought to speak to your father?’ In reply to this anxious inquiry, Miss Mabel Webbe's pretty face grew unusually solemn. She shook her head doubtfully. “T don't know what to say about it, dear,"’ she said at last. “I have every reason to believe that papa likes you. And yet, and yet" There was a brief pause. Mr. Jonas Wetherly unconsciously straightened himself up. “I'm sure,"’ he said, “that your father has no reason not to like me. So far as I am concerned everything has been open and above board. I'm in a position to give you a nice little home, and, inasmuch as I have been faithful in my at- tentions for some time, I see no reason why I should not speak to your father—now.”’ Mabel blushed becomingly. “There isn’t,"’ she protested. “Really there isn’t. Only of course it is bound to be somewhat in the nature of a shock, even if papa knew beforehand that, that—’” She stopped and blushed more vividly than ever. Jonas took her hand encouraging “ Now, darling.’’ he said, “tell me the truth. Just what is the matter with your father? ’” “Nothing. The idea!’* “ But there is. I've felt it for some time. He has some peculiarity, something that makes you afraid to broach the subject. Tell me all, Mabel; there should be no secrets be- tween us. I promise to say nothing.” “ And you won't misjudge papa hastily—you will wait?’ “Certainly. I may say right now that I am already very fond of him. He has been uniformly courteous to me.’ “Oh, yes, that is papa’s way. But, dear, he is peculiar in one respect. The fact is, papa is economical. Now don’ fer that he is mean—papa is the soul of honor and justice— but he shrinks, actually shrinks, at the thought of spending money. And then he is so methodical and so business-like. That is why I hesitate to speak to him about our wedding.” “ But, my dear, that need not be an obstacle. We can have as inexpensive a wedding as you please. I shall be entirely satisfied as long," he added lovingly, “as it is a real, true wedding.” Mabel tossed her head slightly. “You don’t understand,’” she replied. “I was afraid that you wouldn’t understand. You see that wouldn't be papa’s wish. He hates awfully to spend a cent, but when he does a thing he always does it well. Of course, we have a certain position to maintain. We would have to have—well, a real nice wedding, you know, and mamma and I have talked and talked about it, and we don’t know exactly how to approach papa