Life — January 14, 1909 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

-LIFE: Breakfast Cocoa Pure, soluble, delicious in flavor, easily digested and satisfying. The most highly nutritious of all pure food beverages. Specially recommended for the use of invalids, children and those advanced in years. Maillard’s famous Vanilla Chocolate Flavcred with the true Vanilla bean only. Made from the finest selected cocoas, At all leading Grocers FIFTH AVENUE AND 35TH STREET VISIT THE LUNCHEON TAURANT Mark Twain not long ago was relating his newspaper experience in San Francisco, and did not conceal the’ fact that he had been’ “fired”? from the Call for being the “laziest cuss on the a One of his auditors. was inclined Re the acumen of a city editor who tas to discharge a genius such as Mark Twain afterward proved to be. . “No, he dead right,” expostulated the humorist. a-done the same thing to my- self, for I didn’t get on to what I was good for until some time afterward.""—The Wasp. Not an Up-to-Date Church Two colored sisters living met on the street one day, and ton, who had recently joined the church, was describing her experiences. “"Deed, Mrs. Johnsing, I'se jined the Baptist Church, but I couldn't do all the jining here, ‘cause they had to take me to the city church to baptize me. You know there ain't no pool-room in the church here.”'—Success AT BEAR SPRING WAT! purity has made tt famous A Linguist The charm of Mrs. Ruth McEnery Stuart's negro dialect stories was greatly enhanced when she read them herself, as she used frequently do in the early days of her fame, for charity church entertainments. Her imitation of negro dialect was excellent, and her small son, who was very proud of her accomplishment in this line, frequently boasted of it among the other children. Once, when some of his school- mates were vaunting the their several mothers, he was overheard to de- clare: “Well, my mother is smarter than any of yours. She can speak two languages.” “What are ?"* demanded his compan- ions. “White and colored.’ Vew York Times. Asmuviter, N. C.: The four-season resort of the South. Tue Maxon, the English-like Inn of Asheville. Green Old Age “Say, ina?” "Don’t call me ‘ma.’ i” “What's a green old age?” “When a man who is bald and wrinkled and tottering marries a young woman who wouldn't look at him a second time if he didn’t have lots of money,” the lady replied, casting a stealthy glance at her husband, who was busy reading the stock quotations, “it may be said that he has lived to a green old age.""—Chicago Record- Herald. Say, ‘mother.’ What is The Latest Thing , my dear rector, I want a little spiritual . "You sce, Mrs. Delancey goes in for Scientific Pantheism. Mrs, Van Giltner goes in for Swami-ism, and Mrs. Simpkins for New Now, can’t you tell me what is the very latest’ thing in religion? '—Harper’s Weekly. Why ruin an expensive Automobile by a poor cylinder oil ? PANHARD OIL solves the problem=try it, Erudite “Oh, baby,” exclaimed the Boston mother, “what does make you cry so?” “T really cannot say," was the unexpected answer. “I have never indulged in introspec- tion.”"—Daily Telegram. winter Bathing on Florida's warm sands and de- lightful water is an alluring thought. The short cut to this pleasure of the Sunny South is to sail for CHARLESTON and JACKSONVILLE on board of one of the fine steamers of the CLYDE LINE St. Johns River Service between Jacksonville, Palatka, De Land, Sanford, Enterprise, Fla., and inter- mediate landings. CLYDE STEAMSHIP CO. © B RAYMOND, ¥.P.80. M. AC. HAGERTY, G.P, A General Offices: Pier 36M. R., New York, 22 TO CALIFORNIA Spend the winter in California —winter’s summer garden! Less than three days en route from Chicago via THE OVERLAND LIMITED Leaves Union Passenger Station, Chicago, 6.05 p.m. daily. Car- ries standard sleepers only. An- other train at ro:10 p.m. Carries standard and tourist sleepers. Descriptive books free. F. A. MILLER, G.P.A., - Chicago GEO. A. BLAIR, G.E.A., New York CHICAGO MILWAUKEE & ST. PAUL RAILWAY Around Porto Rico The special tours of the New York & Porto Rico Steamship Co. occupy three weeks, and are ideal yachting excursions on summer seas, The steamers have every con- .| venience, with only outside staterooms, They circle the entire island and ties, The ship is the tourist's hotel du that the labor and inconvenience of land travel is avoided. The special tourist rate for this cruise is $140,which includes every expense. Write for illustrated booklet. THE NEW YORK & PORTO RICO STEAMSHIP CO. 12 Broadway, New York, or Raymond & Whitcamb Co., New York, and all Priocipal Cities stop at many interesting and historic locali- the entire trip,so CHANGE FOR THE BETTOR phab ting every thie eveni them I beg write Or ner \ the | must upon after With the Win HON comicbooks.com