Life — August 6, 1908 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

gi bdiewe s The Besnard System of Light Projection A patented system of eclipsing light used in this country excluiecly ia ths SOLARCLIPSE LAMPS Two separate and distinct rays are projected—one long distance (for road use) and one short distance (for City use), The former powerful light penetrates the darkness for over 1000 feet. This ray is made pos- sible through employing special B and L. Solor lens mirror reflectors, It may be instantly cut out at will through the sell-eclipsing mechanism which operates from the dash of the car. Complete description in our 1908 catalog. Badger Brass Manufacturing Company 610 Lyman Avenue Kenosha, Wi No Punctures NoBlow-outs No Trouble The DAYTON AIRLESS TIR looks like pneu-' matic and is just as resilient. Re- quires no pump- ing and cannot puncture or blow- out. Is easily applied to any standard Clinch- er Rim. Is the most durable tire ever made. Requires no attention and is absolutely trouble proof, making automobiling safe and en- joyable. 10 DAYS’ FREE TRIAL Write for illustrated booklet contain- ing full particulars and guarantee. The Dayton Rubber Manufacturing Company 1210 Kiser Street, Dayton, Ohio THE OXYGEN | TOOTH McKESSON & ROBBI A DISAPPOINTMENT The old truth that things are not always what they seem was established anew the other day. In this case the discrepancy between’ fiction ard fact was so great as to be most amusing... Says a writer in the Philadelphia Ledger: It was noon when he entered the crowded restau rant. He stood fully six feet three inches in height, was built in proportion, and must have weighed at least two hundred and fifty pounds. As he strode down between the rows of tables he looked as if he could eat up the house. He took a seat beside a diminutive, fussy little man with a bald head and chop whiskers, who was successfully polishing off a sirloin steak with onions. The little fellow, with his napkin tightly wedged un- der his chin and his mouth full of dinner, looked up in wonder at the gigantic side partner and then down the frail cane-bottomed chair, which creaked and groaned piteously under its immense w But the big fellow took no notice of the little ore. When the waitress approached him he gave his order. Bring me,” he said, in a falsetto voice, “a cup of weak tea and a doughsut."—Youth’s Companion. Two belligerent appearing men faced each other. “You're a liar.” © ght!” shricked a small boy. Then a crowd of curious began to gather in front of the Grant Building in upper Market Street “If you're looking for trouble I guess I can give it to you," hissed the “liar between his teeth You can place a bet that I intend to see things to a finish,” replied the “ pup,” striking a fighting pose. “Come around the corner where a cop won't bother vs, then,” said the first, and, war thus declared, the 0 hastened around to an empty lot behind the post fice, while a crowd of bloodthirsty men and boys ed at their heels. Arrived, the “liar mounted a wooden platform newly . while the “ pup" dove into a dry goods box and extracted therefrom a bulging suitcase. While the ‘doctor? gets out the packages of our magical herbs, guaranteed to cure cancer, bunions, all skin diseases, ete.. [will entertain you with a few sleight-of-hand tricks,” announced the “liar” in stentorian tones, The crowd then realized that it had been gulled. A few on the outskirts slunk away, but the majority remained to fall victims to the wiles of the wily medical fakers and their cureall at “$1 per package, and a pair of cuff buttons, warranted solid gold, thrown in."—San Francisco Coll. COSTLY EYETEETH “I guess paw must have parsed a lot of time at the dentist's when he was in New York,” said Johnny Green. “Why do you think so?” queried his ma. ‘Cause I heard him tell a man toway that it cost him nearly $300 to get his eyeteeth cut,” replied Johnny.—Chicago N FAITH SHATTERED “T don’t believe in that doctor.” “Why?” “He didn't tell me everything I wanted to eat was bad for me! "—London Opinion, HE FORGOT TO INQUIRE American Mituioxaixe: So you want to marry my daughter. But you don't know her. Impecusiovs Duxe: But I will get a kind friend to introduce us. A. M.: But you have never seen her. Lo I have seen you, her father, whom she probably resembles. A. M.: But you don't love her. 1. D.: What matters thst? I but want to marry | her. A. M.: But you can't marry her—there is an’ in- superable obstacle to your wedding her, I. D.: There are no insuperable obstacles to my determination, A. M. (chuckling): This one is. I haven't any daughter.—Baltimore American, a 7 eri YG-RIM E DIAMOND RUBB AKRO OHIO Importation Co OF BRAINS — 1GARS