Life, 1908-07-16 · page 16 of 26
Life — July 16, 1908 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct pieces of satirical content: **"Rev. Suspicious Jones's Eulogy"** (top): A racist dialect piece mocking African American funeral customs. The funeral oration for "Unc' Eefrum" uses exaggerated dialect and portrays the deceased as a chicken thief who was killed stealing from "Marsa Jim's" watermelon patch—perpetuating degrading stereotypes common in early 20th-century "humor." **"Coal"** (middle): Straightforward satirical commentary on coal economics, noting the poor cannot afford it and that children labor in mines. The ironic closing observes coal will run out in a century, but "most of us who are now living will probably have other means of heating up"—dark humor about mortality. **"A New Field"** (right): Political satire imagining articles by wealthy industrialists (Rockefeller, Taft, Bryan, Carnegie, Harriman, Ryan, Vreeland) on humorous topics. The joke mocks their monopolistic practices by suggesting they'd write comedic pieces—implying their real-world behavior isn't funny at all. The page reflects Life's role as a satirical magazine targeting both racial prejudices and corporate malfeasance.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
76 Rev. Suspicious Jones's Eulogy of “ Unc’ Eefrum™ py PRRETHERIN AN’ SISTERS: We has gathered he’ah dis ebenin’ to perfo'm de las’ holy writs over our dearly belobbed brether, Eefrum Wash- ington Fitzhugh Custis Lee ‘Smith, who, still fullo’ de vigor ob his natchul life, while perambulatin’ t'ro Marsa Jim’s watermelon patch, after repeated warnin’ to keep out, came in fo'ceful collision wid Marsa Jim's charge ob buckshot an’ was thereby pe’suaded to buy his ticket on dat fe’yboat ob gol’ an’ silber what sails de blue waters obeternity into dat lan’ ob ebulastin’ life from which no traveler hab ebber returned—ef he done returned he ain't sayed nawthin’ about it. He wah a man o' high mental dis- sipation an’ much se’f con- “trol, Only, exceptin’ once, have he ebber been thwarted in his pu’pose to git what he sot his heart and soul after an’Ah reckon many a fowl in dis neighbor- hood have suffered de malady o’ somnambulism durin’ his life time. Efdey ain't, it wan't his fault. He surved his country mos’ faithfully inde wo! o' de rebellun an’ was rewarded by de reception o” three pensions fo’ his canine ability 0’ furnishin’ de hongry sojurs wif fowl and game. He was a member ob de Ubekiah Lodge 4-11-44, de exalted ruler o’ dat noble oder ob de Brotherhood of Restful Sons o’ Ham. De body will be brought he’ah d’rectly an’ placed on de lef han’ side o' de chu'ch, de cong’egation will fo'm on de right han’ side an’ file aroun’ one by one, an’ take a las’ lingerin’ look at de dead brether, while de choir files into dey places an’ sings dat national-anthem, “All Coons Looks Alike to Me.” Jerome Uhl. Coal OAL is bought by the ton or the bucketful. When bought by the ton it is at the rate of six dollars, and by the bucketful at the rate of sixteer. That is why the poorest people have not contracted the habit of using it. Coal furnishes heat, soot and dividends. It comes first in the form of mines, and when so many children come to work at it, why, it breaks the coal all up. Coal is either hard or soft, At one time hard coal was used among the best people, but the laundries thought it was hurting their business, so soft coal is now used almost everywhere. Hard coal in most cases consists of equal parts of coal and slate. It also comes in the form of clinkers, Pennsylvania is the principal coal-bearing State. It is estimated that our coal will give out in about a hundred years. But by that time most of us who are now living will probably have other means of heating up. This Transitory World “QHE has a small waist, hasn't she?” “Too small. Why the pleasure of getting around it only lasts about a second.” ey) uW i hs, -LIFE- A New Field Ti announcement is made that John D, Rockefeller is writing a series of articles for a magazine which will aim not only to be instructive, but of a humorous nature. Now that Mr. Rockefeller has taken the lead, we may expect other announcements. Mr. Taft may write on great corporations and how to reduce them. Mr. W. J. Bryan: Voice culture. platitudes. Andrew Carnegie: Bonds I have smiled with. E, H. Harriman: Funny things about looting railroads. laugh on every page. Thomas Ryan: Juggling the Inter-Met; a jocularessay. Also insurance anecdotes. Side-splitting incidents illustrating the cheerful side of getting the best of premium payers. H. H. Vreeland: The lighter side of our transportation system. Ho street railroads are humorously stripped. Not a dull line in it, etc, As Usual “HE CLIMBED almost to the top of the ladder—and then fell off.” “ What was the trouble?” “There was a woman at the bottom of it.” Amusing an audience with A L°vE makes the world stand still. Dem. Jackass 4¥ ONLY CHANCE POR SUCCESS IN NOVEMBER IS MY STRIKING RESEMBLANCE TO THE G, 0. P. comicbooks.com