Life — May 7, 1908 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

q If you think you're using the best just because you're using “bond,” it’s time to investigate. COUPON BOND THE DE LUXE BUSINESS PAPER is as superior to ordinary bond papers as real pearl is to imitation. Don’t “wonder if it’s so.’ Let us prove it. Write us today for samples and see for your- self the obvious superiority of this paper. AMERICAN WRITING PAPER CO. Largest Manufacturers of Fine Printing, Cover and Writing Papers in the Werld. 39 Mills HOLYOKE, - - - - MASS, —) ASHION permits just enough variety in the shape and weave of straw hats to ~ suit every man's requirements, but it forbids extremes. Of course, the only way to be sure of style is to get a KNOX HAT And that is not the only reason you should purchase a hat with the Knox trade-mark in it: quality and durability must be present, if you want a fresh-looking hat all Summer. Quality, Durability and Style—only the Knox trade-mark will guarantee all three. [LAY the fest about the julep in the camphor balls at las: For the miracle has happened and the olden days are pu ‘That which made Milwaukee famous doesn't foam in Tenne Ani the Jid in Alabama is as tight locked as can be; And the comic paper Colonel and his cronies well may sigh For the mint is waving gaily, and the South is going dry By the stillside on the hillside in Kentucky, all is still, And the only damp refreshment must be dipped up from the sill North Car'lina’s stately Governor gives his soda glass a shove, And discusses local option with the South Car'lina ( It is useless at the fountain to be winkful of the eye, For the cocktail glass is dusty and the South is going dry It is water, water everywhere, and not a drop to drink, We no longer hear the music of the metlow crystal clink When the Colonel and the General and the Major and the Jelge Meet to have a little nip to give the appetite an edge— For the exgnog now is nogless and the rye has gune awry And the punchhow! hokds carnations and the South is gc The Woman He Wanted HEN Senator James A, Hemenway, of In- diana, was campaigning in southern Indiana recently he delivered an address before an audience of farmers in a country schoolhous In the course of his remarks he reviewed the great prosperity of the country, and as an illustration told a story of a poor farmer who had died, leaving to his wife the farm heavily mortgaged He said that the widow set to work with a will and succeeded upon one year’s wheat crop in paying off the entire mortgage. When he had completed his speech, the Senator, as is customary on such occasions, shook hands and greeted the members of his audience. One middle- aged farmer finally approached him thoughtfully and began: “Senator, you tole a story "bout the widow raising |a mortgage on one year’s crop?” | “Yes, my friend, that was a true story. It |happened only last year, during our prosperous | times." “Senator, could you tell me who that widow is?” queried the farmer. She's. jist the kind of woman |T’ve ben lookin’ for all the time.""—Lippincot's Maga How Rabies Are Manufactured W & REPRINT the following item mer guide to young medical “sci Recipe : Imbecility aa Equal Parts Ignorance Malice Nervousness } Imagination Dog hatred, avid quantum sufficit Shake the ingredients well up, look intently and constantly at the mixture, carefully scan the columns of the daily peess for hyurophobia announcements and imagine every playful, lost, sick of worried dog that is at liberty out of doors is in the frenzied stage of “rabies.""—Woodroffe Hill, of England, Fellee of the Royal C ICE-PRESIDENT FAIRBANKS, at his recent annual reception in Washington, said of a cer- tain deplorable condition: “We don't need new laws to correct this condition. We simply need the old laws’ proper enforcement “The old laws have been construed too mildly. Itis like the state of things in the Benedictine monks’ new convent in Tarragone. “An Indianapolis friend of mine, wintering in Spain, lunched at the monastery of the Benedictines. After lunch he took out his cigar case. “«T don't suppose you object to smoking here?” he said to the white-clad monk attendant. ‘es, sir, we do,’ the monk answered. ‘There is a law against smoking in the refectory.’ “*Then where,’ said my friend, ‘do all the cigar and cigarette stubs come from that I see about me?" “From gentlemen who didn't ask about the Jaw. the monk replied, mildly.’’—News- Book. buildi Witnes Newde were b natu habit. a fiere point the pi escape Each |