Life — January 30, 1908 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Wood, Leonard. A member of the Society of Friends, at one time a doctor in ordinary, and now ruler of the regular army and chief knight of the Royal Chamber, Keeper of the Royal Candelabras, and High Muckamuck to the Philippines. This young man, having nothing in his possession but a smooth tongue and a teddybear, started out to seek his fortune. Finding it in Cuba, he returned to Washington, carefully avoid- ing West Point, and is now leading Administration cotillions. He is a soldier by luck and an clocutionist by occupation. He is the author of “What's the Matter with Havana,” “Toy Soldier,” “The Prince Chap,” ete. “ILL BET A RIGHT JOLLY BUNCH LIVES IN THAT NOUSE, BILI.”” ~LIFE- ~ Who’s What In and Out of America Parkhurst, Charles. A re- formed reformer, one of the first founders of the ‘Tenderloin, now a retired sport. This gentleman acquired his great reputation as the inventor of the game of leap frog. As, unfortunately, he failed to get it copyrighted, it is now played by every one who wants to, without restric- tion, the only benefit he having received from it being a select line of free adver- tising. After this he mingled more or less in politics, but there being no call for advice unaccompanied by certified checks his usefulness was short lived. At present he eats, sleeps, talks and returns from Europe at regular intervals, while his old friend the Tenderloin pats him on the back and commends his efforts to keep silent. Favorite flower: Knight-blooming Serious. His principal recreation is seeing things at night. Author of ‘Ten Nights in a Bar Room,” “Sunrise on the Rialto,” etc. Address, The Haymarket. A Letter Farmington, Conn. DITOR OF LIFE: Dear Sir—I want to thank you for your always fine support of the good and condemnation of wrong of whatever kind. To my mind you are the greatest force for good I know, and you have hundreds of quiet appreciators like myself. Yours most sincerely, (Mrs.) Frances C. Stistson. “OU CAN At George. At one time a popular humorist. By diligent luck and ability, this young man has risen to the front rank of those who make money by writing at posterity and jor the present. He began life in prehistoric Chicago, learned the trade of hieroglyphics, and wound up in modern Egypt, where he covered the mummies with slang and gave them a new lease of life. As a syllable slinger, a handy man about the English language, a willing worker in grafting adjectives, he has no equal. His favorite occupation has been telling the truth in Fables, but latterly he has been excavating ideas behind the footlights. Some of his finds have been excellent, but some think the pocket is running to too much money. Never having been through a college he yet has had better luck with a college widow than any other man who has been there. Favorite motto: “You can search me.” Address care Thotmes II, Chicago Subway. “T TELL you, that boy and his sister have done well.” “They rose from a condition of great poverty, didn’t they ?”” “T should say so. Why, they were born into the family of a United States army officer.” Comicbooks.com