Life — February 28, 1907 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘LIFE ® Cupid's Weather Map F GLADYS had sent me no message, Or the mail from Palm Beach met mis- hap, ‘Though I lacked premonition or presage Or courage the wires to tap, I am sure I could learn when she planned her return From one look at the weather man’s map. You'll notice, no matter in what light ‘These loops and festoons you may view, Wherever she moves, like a spot-light, A zone of fair weather moves, too. ‘The breezes of May will be blowing her way When our ears and our fingers are blue. A Mean Spirit HERE has, from time immemorial, been a dis- ion to criticize the habits of the very rich, on the ground that they per- mit themselves too many pleasures. ‘There is pop- Se ularly supposed to be a kind of unseemliness in the spectacle of a plutocrat indulging himself in steam yachts, private cars and golf links, sum- mer camps and so forth. In reality this shows a mean spirit toward the very rich. Why, indeed, should we grudge them the few pleasures they have, when there are so many that they cannot buy? Certain brands of friendship, or a good digestion, or hard-working and conscien- zero\s One sunshiny patch, set off clearly In a country with rain-clouds all black, To-day travels northward or nearly, While a blizzard descends in its track. Can I possibly err if from this I infer ‘That Gladys is on her way back? No; the stupid old map of the weather Tells the news in its tiniest line. The isotherms nestle together, The isobars tenderly twine, While the forecast they print bears so rosy a tint It well might be Cupid’s—or mine. Philip Loring Allen. tious children, cannot be obtained by the very rich. Instead, they have to content themselves with all the cheaper things that money can buy. Let them therefore enjoy themselves in their small way. They deserve to be made happy over trifles, assuming that they always have the necessary capacity. Doubtful Progress UR ancestors said, ‘God save the and bowed their heads. But we say, “Damn the Standard Oil crowd!” and look very fierce and cocky and disrespectful. To such a degree has democracy affected the sentiments of the ruled to ward their rulers. Is mankind the bet- ter for having such a grouch against the inevitable ? Our Ad Column CONOMICAL WIVES WANTED—Only those need apply who can go through a de- partment store on Monday without buying anything. Ladies who can keep books, check up bills and audit accounts, and yet retain their beauty and sentiment. StatrsMEN—Gentlemen with moder- ate incomes and fair average ability can find useful employment. Apply at the Capitol, Washington, 9-5. No references required. Applicants must be able to read and write, and have a working knowledge of Wall Street quotations. Easy hours and a full dinner-pail. To Muck-Rakers—Those who have been making a livelihood at muck-raking and wish new work in other lines can be accommodated on farms. Good hands in great demand. Hours from 2 A.a1. to 1 P.M. A relief from literary work. Lost.—Somewhere along the line of the Southern Pacific Railroad, a reputa- tion. It was done up in a safe-deposit en- velope and badly damaged. Of no use to any one else but me. No reward. Finder will receive thanks on return. Novet Hanps Wantep—To write on forthcoming books. Plot-makers will be paid extra wages. Conversation experts can get permanent positions. Apply to ‘Typos & Skinner, Publishers. RIGGS: Are you fully recovered from your last operation ? Griccs: No—I have still several notes to pay. Proverb for a Dachshund Ales well that ends well. YOREWARNED 15 FOUR-ARMED comicbooks.com