Life — December 27, 1906 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Dooley on Domestic Discipline ¥ ME: DOOLEY, in his recently publish “Dissertions,” domestic disci- pline in his own inimitable way: “No gintleman shud wallop his wife, an’ no gintleman wud. I'm in favor iv havin’ wife} 4 beaters whipped, an’ I'll go further an’ say that | ‘twud be a good thing to have ivry marrid man scoorged about wanst a month. As a bachelor 6 Ms = man, who rules entirely be love, I’ve spint fifty eS Sartre Ol z IGIN years investigatin’ what Hogan calls th’ martial of ms man uses vilence to his wife. He may not beat € her with a table-leg, but he coerces her with ‘ : ) hismind. He can puta savage remark to th’ pint . $8 th jaw with more Iasi’ effect thin a ight ’ _ \ ——$—$——I | ag her around be th’ hair her be her sympathies, s. Asa last raycoo beats her be doin’ things that make her pity An’ th’ ladies, Gawd bless thim, like it heart ivry woman likes th’ sthrong arm. Ye very sildom see th’ wife iv an habitchool wife-beater lavin’ him. Th’ husband that gives his wife a vilet bokay is as apt to lose her as th’ husband that gives her a vilet eye. Th’ man that breaks th’ furniture, tips over th’ table, kicks th’ dog an’ pegs th’ lamp at th’ lady of his choice is seen no more often in our justly popylar divoorce coors thin th’ man who comes home arly to feed th’ canary. Manny a skillful mandolin-player has been onable to prevint his wife fr’m clopin’ with a prize-fighter.” i HE. Food FREAT BEAR SPRING WATE | | f Va ue O parity hens sae His Compliment | 9 . A SSISTANT secretary of one of the | ET ER’ ederal departments at Washington in con- } . versation frequently betrays his Celtic origin, One day lately he lost his umbrella during afm 1S universally recognized. It is tour of several shops in quest of an article for his ] nutrition in its most practical and wife. Concluding that the umbrella must have been left in one of the three stores in question; | portable form, and is unrivalled in doubled on his trail and revisited them in turn. “The umbrella has not been found here,’ he delicacy of flavor. You never grow was told at the first ¢stablishment. The same announcement was made at the u second shop; whereupon the official, with a hope- tired of 9 less air, made his way to the third store. | E a. There, to his delight, the umbrella was await: | ing him, As the floor-walker handed it over, the a , The leading eating chocolate of the world overjoyed Celt exclaimed: LAMONT, CORLISS & CO., Sole Importers, New York “Well, I must say you are more honest here | than at those other stores!” —Harper's i Sword of King Behanzin = : — : —— EHANZIN, King of Dahomey, has presented The first Derby made in America was a er for the Col- C&K is sword to the French Mini ‘The weapon was purchased i rs ago ata theatrical costumer’s by an explorer, who after- ward gave it to Behanzin. Nl ap p- 4 The King ordered the court armorer to make a sheath for it out of empty sardine tins, and wore it until quite recently.—London Evening Standard. and | FLORIST Nig | Extablished 1874 | | Year Gifts a | Specialty | hats are the best made. Knapp- Felt DeLuxe $6. Knapp-Felt $4. Write for * The Hatman™ OCTOR: You must go to a “rest cure.” It — will only cost you $1,000. y | | F Panient: But I can send my wife to Europe| THE CrRoruT & KNapp Co. N.E. Cor, 44th St. and Madison Ave., N.Y. | for less.—Exchange. . Broadway, at 13th Street New York = = comicbooks.com