Life — August 2, 1906 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

T LOOKS a attend the ¢ 1er will have to come to n of go over to Philadelphia. —Beston Glode That's pretty tough on him, but the Court of Appeals may save him. H It is the opinion of Colonel Lewis, of Pittsburg, that there will be no lawyers 800 years hence. — Rochester Democrat. The Colonel seems to have very J & definite ideas about the end of the @ world ( Pp The fourth son of the German Emperor Nee is coming to this country and to Harvard to é finish his education. — Boston Herald. Instead of Rah! rah! rah! i may become Ja! ja! j ‘The son of a Pittsburg millionaire has been arrested for burglary.—Houston Post. Is that all? ‘The country has small confidence in the good dis- position of the meat packers or in Uncle Jimmy Wil- son's ability to make them be good.— Pittsburg Sun. Frequent inspection of the inspectors and frequent changes of their posts would help. “PIASCKS A MONOCHROME JOHANNA WHITE AND JOHNNY BLACK WERE WED ONE SUMMER DAY, AND WHEN THEIR LITTLE DAUGHTER CAME, THEY CALLED HER NELLIE GRAY. LEE * World This is a pretty good country, and it is our business to make it better —Philadel phia Inquirer. Fine. Let’s start with the yellow news- papers. How does that strike you, Mr. Inquirer ? a a AE Senator Bacon wants the Congressional Record read by the people —Heuston Post What sort of an inhuman monster is Senator Bacon, anyway ? ‘The next task which President Castro has pro- posed to himself is to put the Monroe Doctrine out of commission— Baltimore American. Our participation in the Algeciras con- ference and some other things might indicate that our own busy President had anticipated the busy Castro. mM $10,000,000 willl buy 800,000,000 beers. —Wask- ington Post What comfort is there ina statistic like that to the thirsty man who hasn’t a nickel to buy one? ex @ Thomas A Edison says that he will soon place the automobile in the reach of all.—Rochester Post. That will enable us all to deal prompt- ly with the reckless chauffeur who maims or kills and speeds away. ‘orwegian girl can marry she must pre+ fate showing that she can cook.—Port- fand Advertiser. With that law in force here, matri- mony would become extinct. 8 Senator Depew has broken his long silence to say that he won't resign.—Philadel phia Nor “O shame! where is thy blush?” € Mr. J. G. Phelps Stokes, the millionaire, who has decided to become a Socialist, will not carry his con- version so far as to make an actual division of his wealth.—Boston Herald. Not much, Up-to-date Socialism is a case of ‘do as I say, not as I do.” bad Mr. Bryan's chances are brightening in Massa- chusetts—New York Tribune. The Massachusetts chances must, therefore, now be about 16 to 1 aguinst. mericar. “h “'E WONDER IF 1 CAN LAND ON THE GREEN rRow HERE?” Some people are disposed to regard the pure food bill asa pure fake bill —Adanta Constitution. The adulterators and rebaters have done a good deal of snickering in their sleeves since the Republican Congress adjourned, & Tom Platt's United States Express Company buikting in New York is to be twenty-one stories high. —Heouston Post. A twenty-one-story obstacle to the establishment of the parcels post in America, r A New York woman saved her life when attacked by a lion in the Black Hills by singing all night.— Pittsburg Dispatch. It’s a safe bet that’s the woman who practiced all winter across the street from Lirt office. office. It is the poor breakfast that causes the craving for the 14 o'clock copita, and the prospect of a bad dinner at home sends the weary and cavernous husband to the can- tina before wending his way to the scene of domestic reunion. —Mexican Herald. And the copita and cantina obviate any craving for the poor breakfast. comicbooks.com