Life — May 17, 1906 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

-LIFE.- How It Happened Tine: An evening early in June, Prace: The private dining-room in the White House. coffee and glasses of liqueurs, are seat GENERAL LEONARD WOOD: Did you happen to read this moming’s New York Tribune, Mr. President? Tur Presipent: No, General, 1 have been busy all day with my speech on the hand-raising of American babies, to be delivered at the annual convention of the American Mothers’ ciation GrNERAL Woop (taking a clipping from his waistcoat pocket): It is a paragraph from the leading editorial; (start- ing to hand it to the President) 1 thought you might be interested in it Senator Lopce (winking at the others): Read it aloud, General. We'd all like to hear GENERAL Woop (reading): “It is now time for the President to speak. The entire country, and not alone the Republican Party, is listening. It is for him to say now whether he will accept the nomination of the Re- publican Convention for the Presidency, and thus save the country from ruin,or decline the nomination and let the United States fall to a place among the lost nations of the world. The enemies of our noble President claim that he is still bound by his promise not to accept a renomination Such a promise, if promise there was, was given in an unthinking moment. Such promises among statesmen are given only to be broken, Here the command of the People (and of our leading manufacturers) is above a private obli gation. The eyes of the world are upon Theodore Roosevelt. No one who knows him doubts what | he will do.” i} Tur Secretary or State: That expresses my views exactly, Mr. President. Tue Presipent: I know, Mr. Secretary. It sounds as though you might have written it yourself. Tur Secretary or Wa You don’t seem to see this in the right light, Mr. President. You have done many different things. You are the only real American left. The People are grateful to you for your conquest of the Senators and for showing them that it is the President who makes the appointments. You have saved the country from the greedy grasp of railroads by compelling them to give the same rates to every one. You have destroyed the Trusts. You have civilized the Filipinos by your congratulatory letters to our victorious generals. You have built the Panama Canal. You have settled the race question in the South But I will not weary you by continuing the list of things you said you would do and have done, There is not a branch of our public or domestic life in which your energy has not made itself felt and the People—the plain People—want you. Tue Present: But my promise, gentlemen— ‘Tur SECRETARY OF STATE (soothingl: Is of no legal effect, Mr. President. Morally, it will be easy to explain that mT \ ti 10908. About a table, on which are partly emptied cups of ajter-dinner five distinguished gentlemen, some of them smoking. in the changed conditions, in the absolute absence of any other citizen competent to be President, such a promise, as given, is null, void and of no effect. Senator Lopce: And you must consider, Mr. President, the needs of our great industrial system. With a change of administration it is likely that there will be tariff-tinkering. You know how that disturbs speculation in Wall Street and how it will make it impossible for our struggling American manufacturers to charge Americans so much for their manu- factures that they can afford to sell them at much lower prices in foreign markets. This would be a terrible hardship to the struggling masses of Europe, Asia and Africa. Our Re- publican millionaires are strongly opposed to any such change and you must listen to the voice of the People. GexeraL Woop: Consider, also, Mr. President, the condition of the Army. There are still in the line of promotion men whose only claim to recognition is that they have been good soldiers and have served the country long and faithfully, With another President these men might receive the military rewards they are foolish enough to expect. In that case what would become of the favored ones—the scarred veterans of Tampa and Camp Black, your own comrades in arms, the second cousins of Senators’ wives and the others who want to be Licutenant- Generals ? Tue Secretary or War: There is no other way out of it. The Party insists on nominating you and the People are simply crazy to elect you. You needn't devote too much energy to the legitimate duties of the office, nor pin your attention down to any one thing. You can go off on as many hunting-trips as you like, and you can reform every game in the country from draw-poker to mumblety You shall not only have a special train for yourself whenever you want to go travelling, but a special battleship will be set aside for the use of each member of your family, and, if there are not enough of them, we will build some more. Senator Lopce: And I can assure you, Mr. President, that if you will serve another term, the Senate will do anything you want it to, We'll all be good boys and won’t ask for any appointments. We'll pass any bill if you want us to, if it doesn’t affect the Sacred Tariff. Att: Do be President again, Mr. President! want you and we beseech you. Tue Present: Well, gentlemen, since you put it that way, I do not see how I can decline. I will obey the call of duty and once more save the country (General handshaking, while the Secretary of State jumps to the telephone and calls up the New York Tribune.) The People comicbooks.com