Life, 1906-05-03 · page 28 of 44
Life — May 3, 1906 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine contains satirical commentary on wealthy industrialist **Andrew Carnegie** and the SPCA (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals). **"The Kiss Carnegetic"** mocks Carnegie's philanthropic strategy of giving away his wealth through donations of schools and churches. The satire suggests that Carnegie accompanies each donation with a public "kiss"—meaning he seeks credit and public affection for his generosity. The poem contrasts this with the "steel" (his industrial ruthlessness) beneath his tender public persona, implying his philanthropy is performative rather than purely altruistic. The reference to Hobson's kiss suggests Carnegie's version is more prolonged and self-aggrandizing. **"All's Well That Ends Well"** criticizes the SPCA's internal politics, suggesting that despite the organization's reform efforts, some members (particularly someone named Haines) have resisted change until recently forced out by public pressure and activist Turnure's Reform Association. The page also includes unrelated content: an obituary joke and a judge/witness joke about marital discord.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
560 The Kiss Carnegetic “Compared to Mr. Carnegie’s kiss.” she said “Hobson's was a mere peck on th understands the philosophy of kis pd his kiss lingers. ps. Mr. Carnegie time to it York Sun. H® HATES to keep his wealth, they say; He dotes upon donatic And with each book he gives away He adds an osculation Th ging, stinging kind le osculation. To every town he gives a school, \ church to every ¢ ather than be lies young and pretty acking, cracki He gives " n they're When children to his doorstep come They do not ask for But rather ery, “O give us some h kisses, Uncle AV ne kind, the soulsor Of sweetmeat, Uncle Andy!” willing spender— ww strange that one can deal in stecl Yet be so v It is so very tender id all millionaires persist cof the bonny, nthuse on be ar old Uncle Joh The oily, coily Standard Dispensed by Unele be kind and never mind— gh John is not ws sink of his wealth and For even h Ah, such is F All magnates are magnetic ing game WE All's Well That Ends Well R. GORDON KNOX BELL one of the executive committee of the $.P.C.A.,, is reported as saying: refi 1 fre conclusively . ve ousted Haines Now, if Mr. Bell is correctly re- ported doubt—he is merely voicing what are believed to which we be the sentiments prevailing in the inner sanctuary of the S. PLC. A -LIFE- “inside” members, with one or ceptions, have achieved nothing in the way of reforming the society, until recently awakened by pub- lic opinion. And as Mr. Turnure and his S. P. C. A. Reform Association were largely instrumental in arousing this public opinion, it seems that too much contempt for their very successful efforts might be a wee bit superfluous However, Haines is going. So let us all be joyful NE swallow does not make a bum- mer. Obituary (A la Mental Heating) ERE lies William Jones, Who once thought he was ill; He thought aches in his bones, He thought fever and chill. So we think, in our minds, When we come to this spot, ‘That our poor brother finds He is buried—in thought HE JUDGE: Now, sir, what sort of words did you have with your wife? Witness: Hers, your Honor. THE FIRST “QUICK LUNCH™ comicbooks.com