Life, 1906-04-05 · page 17 of 58
Life — April 5, 1906 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous anecdotes typical of early 20th-century American satire: **"A Honeyed Rebuke"** mocks empty gratitude—a boy repeatedly runs errands for an old gentleman who offers only effusive thanks. When finally thanked profusely, the boy wistfully replies he wishes the man would thank him *with money* instead. **"Worse Yet"** presents a domestic joke: a man warns his son never to be impertinent to his wife. When the boy later runs away with the man's own wife, the father's hypocrisy becomes the punchline. **District Attorney Jerome reference** appears to be a genuine anecdote about New York DA Jerome's quirky habit of eating candy during court proceedings—presented as charming eccentricity rather than criticism. The page is primarily **advertising** for the Knabe-Angelus player piano, emphasizing its mechanical sophistication and artistic legitimacy. Brief additional jokes mock theater admission ("charge nothing to draw crowds") and religion ("church bells remind forgetful believers").
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Honeyed Rebuke. OBBIE was in the habit of running er- | rands for an old gentleman next door | who never paid him except in effusive thanks. He had just returned from the third errand | norning, and the old gentleman, patting 1 the head, said: I am very much obliged to you 1 fine little fellow. Thank you, my boy, thank you.” | joked up in his face wistfully, and lly replied : s, you don't kr 1k you for something.” w how T wish T Harper's WELL-KNOWN business man on return- d his talking seriously to his small son for an- back. After listening a while the man “My hoy,” he | want you to understand that 1 wont That's ays bear in mind.” He ng home one evening recently h to the conversation you to be impertinent to my wife thing you must a t staggered by the r yswer he got me, father. 1 wouldn't have answered if Vd known she was your wife!” & Globe. WELL, TMAVE MY COMING-OUT FROCK ON Worse Yet. T° 1: How's our old friend Dick? Harry: Don't speak of him—poor fel low! What—is he dead?” Wa than Ul Heavens! What has happened to him?" Hes run off with my wife !"—Translated | for Tales from La Vida Galante. == | D!SfRICT ATTORNEY JEROME'S weak | nesses are candy eating, cooking strange dishes and making furniture. During his ex- amination of the Texan witnesses in the Pat- tick case the District Attorney had a bag of butter scotch on the table beside him and into it every little while. Once, in the y and, not locating it, stopped abrupt- ed around and found it had disap- A reporter was calmly munching its Mr. Jerome joined in the laughter and continued his argument—New York Sun contents, Kuahe: COMPETENT critic de- clared that this player-piano “presents an _ irresistible strength and is an attraction which must appeal to the public as no other existing combination can.” He did not overstate the fact, and how could he, for this instrument is the combined product of the two companies— Wm. Knabe & Company and The Wilcox & White Company — occupying the foremost positions in the manufacture of pianos and piano-playing devices. The touch and incomparable tone of the Knabe Piano are not impaired by installing the ANGELUS entirely within the piano case, so the instrument is perfectly satisfac- tory to the trained musician of the highest artistic standard and is anever failing source of delight and entertainment to everyone who plays it by means of the ANGELUS. For ten years the ANGELUS has been constantly developed by its inventive origi- nators to its present point of superiority. It possesses peculiar and original mechanical advantages such as the wonderful melody buttons and the famous phrasing lever and the diaphragm pneumatics producing the humantouch. These give the performer the means to produce truly artistic music and obtain effects not possible with any other piano player. The case of the KNABE-ANGELUS is of elegant design and beautiful finish and is made of most carefully selected veneers of choicest figure. Write for handsome booklet and name of our nearest local agency. elias ‘The Knabe-Angelus Ready to be played by hand, ‘The Knabe- Angelus Ready to be played by ANGELUS Roll. THE WILCOX & WHITE COMPANY Established 1876 MERIDEN, CONNECTICUT, U.S. A. A Drawing Card. | AM going to open a new theatre, and I wonder what announcement I ought to hang up at the door to attract the public.” "You might try: ‘Admittance free.’ Translated for Tales from Le Rive. HURCH bells are necessary to remind some people that they have religion.— Chicago Daily News. AT 3 fecent political mecting in England, the speaker made a jest, and, finding that his audience had missed the point of it, said, playfully: “I had hoped, gentlemen, that you would laugh at that.” A plaintive v came through the silence, “I laughed, mist Then everybody did. —Argonant, HE water wagon is a reliable vehicle that travels on dry land.—Saturday E Post. comicbooks.com