Life, 1906-04-05 · page 12 of 58
Life — April 5, 1906 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily a **Lowney's Chocolate advertisement** featuring an elegant portrait of a woman in an ornamental frame. The ad emphasizes quality ingredients and purity—standard luxury marketing for early 20th-century confectionery. The right column contains three brief satirical pieces typical of *Life* magazine's humor section: 1. **"Scant Doings at a Winter Resort"** mocks the dullness of wealthy winter destinations, quoting a society publication lamenting lack of excitement. 2. **"Wanted Further Orders"** satirizes Senator Tillman's authoritarian leadership style through an anecdote about a militia captain demanding men grow mustaches—critiquing arbitrary abuse of power. 3. **"The Quicker Way"** is a joke about railroad advancement, where an ambitious young man climbs the corporate ladder by running a locomotive better than instructed. These reflect *Life's* characteristic social satire targeting authority figures and American pretension.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
CHOCOLATE BON-BONS are the most delicious and the most perfect of confections. In their making nothing is used but the choicest chocolate, pure cane sugar, finest nuts and fruits and purest extracts of fruits and flowers. THE WALTER M. LOWNEY COMPANY. BOSTON, MASS, For the Sick Room. HAT can be better than a bound volume of LIFE, For the Nursery. with its miscellany of high class, artistic and satir- 4 ical pictures and text ? For the Library Table. ' Fox a Profesional. Maxis Ww can supply any of the more recent volumes of LIFE Waiting Room durably bound in cloth at $4.00 per volume, postpaid. For Any Body, Any Place, AS allowance of $2.00 is made if the loose copies are Any Time. returned. LIFE PUBLISHING COMPANY, 17 West Thirty-first Street, New York. Scant Doings at a Winter Resort. HERE'S almost nothing going on Down here where balmy breezes blow, With all their ultra-swellish hops And a rather daring burlesque show. My lady dresses for the ball ; The burlesque girls their costumes don ; Oh, it’s no exaggeration wheo I say There's almost nothing going on ! Ep, Mort in Mew 3rd Sun, Wanted Further Orders. NATOR TILLMAN was accusing a po- litical leader of overbearing, arbitrary methods. “He goes too far,” said the Senator. “He the militia captain they used to have in Concord. “This man came to Concord with a wa: record, and got a captain's appointment in the militia. “He was a martinet. The first day he re- viewed his company he examined every hair on their heads, every button on their coats. It was an ordeal for them. “On the whole the captain was pleased with his inspection. One thing dissatisfied him though. His men all had clean shaven upper lips. Some had side whiskers, some had mut ton chops, some had goatees, some had patri otic chin beards. There was not one who had a mustache, The captain complimented his company in a short speech, and concluded by sayin “Only one thing is lacking to mak al looking company of you—n every man Jack of you to t this order the men looked at on other, and a young farmer, stepping the ranks, saluted and said: “What color will you have them, s Mikcaukee Sentinel. The Quicker Way. ATT, the president of the Penm sylvania. Railroad, said at his New Year's reception, anent an inexperienced » mai “That reminds me of a Western lad. a place on a railroad, became a braker a fireman, and one day, in an emergency, he undertook to run a locomotiv “He ran the locomotive well enough, | | could not stop with the necessary precision, fo this needs practice. “With one station in particular he had trou: ble. He ran some thirty yards beyond this station, and then, putting back, he ran a the other way. He was preparing for a attempt, when the station agent put his out of the window and shouted : “‘Stay where you are, Jim. We'll shift the station for you.’ "—New York Tribune. YOUNGER'S SCOTCH ALE is a wholesome, nouris ing beverage. Best for building up.—Ade.