Life — March 1, 1906 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

275 Frank Lowden knows on which side of a cow to sit when he goes to milk her.—Chicago N The outside, of course. ) What we can't understand is why Brother Metcalfe, of Live, was so blamed anxious to break into those New Vork theatres.—Chicagu Journal. Just an average American ambition to call a bluff. ? Joseph has been held up in the Rockefeller Sunday Sct ARCEL PREVOST, the author, is a candidate for the French Senate, —Indianapolis News, American authors have more self-respect than that. A dabbler in statistics has figured out that Anna Gould's count has cont her $2,017 a day.—Kochester Post. Almost as expensive as Anna's father was to the Erie stockholders. Richard Mansfield declares that, in fact, every man is an actor, —Cin- cinnati Commercial. | Ergo, Richard Mansfield is an actor. € There is something really pathetic about Sir Francis C. Burnand's more than forty years of industrious endeavor to make Punch humorous.— Vork Sun, Nonsense ; he never tried to. His job has been to keep Punch down to the British standard of mirth, He has done it conscientiously and ably. ‘There is still considerable anxiety about the ice crop.—Aeston Herald. + Don’t worry, Boston, You still have the belles of Beacon Street. bea we China's envoys inspected Niagara Falls yesterday. — Pittsburgh Just in time. Pretty soon there won't be any Is, Marriage should be made more difficult.—Former Police Commissioner McAdoo. Meaning that getting married should be made more difficult. Quite a few already find marriage sufficiently difficult. fe) Mrs. Theodore Roosevelt actually got her name in the society columns of the newspapers the other day.—Fort Worth Record. A rather nasty way of alluding toa most commendable, unusual, and re- freshing modesty. eA comme) The fact that some girls spend from $10,900 to $25,000 for a trousseau docsn't disturb the average young man in the least.—/ndianapolis News, The disturbance comes when the average (ices WEATHER FOR young man tries to harmonize that trous- WEEK. seau with the average income. squats. asa model. —Baltimore American . Probably held up for the profits on that cor- ner in corn. & If you had John D, Rockefeller’s faculty of not talking b you would get along better than y Atchison Globe. True, but John’s moncy talks. ) Every time a legislator pays his fare he imbibes more inspi tion to stand up for the rights of the people. —/%ttsburgh Post On the New York street cars we pay our fares An Eastern newspaper devotes a page to a symposium on the question: “Is Hetty Green happy ?"—Buffalo Indeed, she isn’t. There are a few dollars in this world she can’t get as long as Uncle Russ Sage ? With the New York Legislature in session it may be necessary to again put a guard around Niagara Falls, The safer way probably will be to move the Falls out of the reach of the Legislature.—Philadedphia Press Why not make a permanent job of it by sending the Legislature over the Falls? Senator Platt says, “Senator Depew will resign when I do.""—Cincinnatt Commercial. Careful, Mr. Senior Senator, Remember those insurance gentlemen who, a little while ago, hadn’t any intention of resigning. Between the Smoot cused d supervising the wedding gilts to Miss Roosevelt, the W T. U. is enjoying quite strenuous days.—S/. Louis Globe. Some women butt in where others fear to tread. = Have a thought for the future. Save your coal.—/»- dianapolis News. ‘The general impression has always been that for that kind of a future those in au- thority supplied the fuel. % Can you think of anything funnier than the action of the Governor of West Virginia in asking the United States Senate to come to the State's rescue from the Coal Trust and the Pennsylvania Railroad ?—Chicago Journal. Yep. That the Senate should do it. ay said that the boys of Kansas do not know what a Houston Pest. Come East, young men. ECAST FOR THIS comicbooks.com