Life — December 28, 1905 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Ss OUR FOOLISHy (ONTEMPORARIESS SAY A Kansas City man came up to a lecturer in hotel there, “Well, sir, saying with enthusiasm I enjoyed your lecture very much last I didn't see you th “Oh, 1 wasi “Well, wh foyed my le “Ob, I here ye by tell me you en. ‘ork Tribune re is the brid + the stream of disappoint ment.—Chicago D. HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON The ideal hotel of America for permanent and transient guests. \ Loxpow paper crowd of sight seers scurrying act from Strand caused a partial block in The | of 1 particularly pompous n roused the ire of the held hurry up there, can't ye “Am I "wast 1 ex pestulation "Urrying?”" sac a flick of his plaster!"—Troy Time Orleans Pic Axoxew Carwecie greatly admires Ernst Haeckel, and not Io} he ¢ ioned a young man who was about to become a studer Jena to get for him a Haeckel autograph. The autograph, in English, in due course arriv Tt read: “Ernst Haeckel gi fully of a Zciss micra the Jena Univer arrived with Mr, Car knowledges the receipt fre in a few weeks—The nthe # make an inventory of the t child, lay the man ng sweetly I But the inventory been wholly the top of the pag “One revolving Marryine a little creature nd sometimes comes “Tix.” said the teach that wriggles about in hink of another he earth and top through a small hole. d the youngster, in tri accident It’s your right arm that now; yesterday it was your left. “Well, bos: see I got concussion o° the brain in the same nt, and it fixed remember which arm’s gone!"—C Joxrs: appears to be gor ye 0 T can't never land Leader, Tue Medical Profession recommend YOUNGER'’S SCOTCH ALE on account of its purity,—Ade. case give something ter a pore man | you do drink, d = ewe” ce = So fill up The loving cup, And toast all those we BE Whiskey ‘WHITE, HENTZ & CO. Phila. and New York AT ALL FIRST-CLASS DE rw. ~ )\Aq, Green Label. rink Trim ; le” “This is the time of the year For good wishes and good cheer, hold dear.” EsTaBLisHeD ALERS No Way of Escape. ITTLE FREDDY (after listening to the usual matutinal quarrel between his father and mother): Mamma, if a little boy is very, | very good all the time when he is little, does have to get married when he’s grown up? Mranslated for Tales from “Familie-Journal.” Wakaroff Genuine Russian Cigarets oa wast to be E eo .0) $0 Tome a it parte, Ad © KOMPANIJA MAKAROT? 850 The Fine Arta Blég..Chicage DO YOU DRINK Or tea that’s poor No, Then why drink a Scotch that you're tired of? If you are nota “regular,” try adew- ball made with SANDERSON’S “MOUNTAIN DEW" SCOTCH It’s a real Scotch. past; clever short stories, preferably length, accepted for publica- tion in LIFE, payment on acceptance. long as it is interesting, will be considered. accompanied by a stamped envelope and be addressed to Contributors E will pay at the rate of five cents a word for Lr not over 4,000 words in 4 Any kind of a story, so All manuscripts should be return The Editor of LIFE, 17 West Thirty-first Street, New York. comicbooks.com