Life — December 9, 1905 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

tip that makes it practically a lead:pipe cinch. You've got to die to make a win. If you're lucky you may catch a case of typhoid, but usually you ain't lucky You boil your water and go on paying your bet every six months. Ain‘t it?” ou know I never argue with you," said HIS SAVINGS. oar When mother's sick, the house i “I'm going to quit saving,” announced the bill So strangely hushed a Li clerk. “There's nothing to I've mother never will adm't ind to squander my fifteen per on fine ment and riotous living.” re's no telling about Government bonds,” pursued the bitlclerk. “I've heard people say thet ar Governm won't last twenty years at the rate g- The trusts won't doa thing but repudi je do a th “I dislike to hear a naturally thrifty young man There's nothing any one ean you talk in that way,” said the cashier, gravely. She just lies there, and tries tc You want to bear in mind that the sun of prosperity Herself, by cunning little tricks! does not ever shine and that youth passes away. Lay “Have you got much saved now?" inquired replied the billclerk, “ are too shaky. I'm going down to-morrow + r—why, the word ecent provision for your old age and a rainy Gut the Whole eight: dollars sndcbuy Wel 4a Gulls uts as being most absurd. t least."” '—Chicago Tribene. And when he comes he has to guess "s the use?" que’ Ie here At symptoms that she won't confess; iNT lay it up? It's no cinch that the man behind WHERE BABIES SWIM, And he’s apt to frown and say newon/tatikkime. Up onthe: street €6r “1 shall spend the winter in Samoa,” said a trav ‘You should have is always. summ ere. There the babic IN come agai It’s bed, you see, a week oF more! ie, Cs When father’s sick—I tell yo ost of babies, nc two years ¢ You ought to hi owing and swimming like fish in ; The talk of “dyi > 1 sce this sight in believe sea baths ben climate they bathe ters soon learn to swi y can walk, > sce these pretty brown babies swim in the sea is well worth a 5,000 mile trip to Sam While father grunts his pains and fc on Philadelphia Bulletis Can't you see I'm awful sick he doctor sits Ile leaves some drops, and tells us . less I'm needed I sha‘n't come MIS REQUEST 1 he'll do all right And father's up, perhaps, by night! A TERRIBLE THREAT week before commence The Father : YOUNG MAN, HAVE YOU BEEN MAKING Neel belo encen was weary of Loarding-h LOVE TO MY DAUGHTER? Cia dbantii gaged in donning lighted anticipation played upon his feature w bins entered in “Hello, Charley:” mes, cheerily. “What's “WE HAS BEEN (rymg TO, PAPA.” “Extra Billy” Smith, the Confede st patri c ec leading a regime di al Weary and exhau y he West wayside. When ¢ necessary General gave the order, but the tired me stretched up round. TI order was ald, peremptorily. Still no motion. By this time the tem white heat. He up “Oh, nothing up,” said Robbins. “I'm just ¢ round to the Clemenses to call—going to see if I can't to Lonesomehurst, p get asked to dinner. > with the subi ¢ smile faded slowly from Jones’ featurcs. T see myself, “Ob, I say, Charley,” he expestulated, “can’t I be w began to pave the boulevari ko somewhere else? I was going there."—K. and put in a sewer system? Not for little Wit! : City Independent. dered sooner go East and try to astonish Wall Street.” "Have you any life insurance?” asked the cashier. “I saw Grumby talking to you yesterday at's a worse gamble yet,” said the bill-clerk. ver spoke to you any more?” Insurance is a gamble from start to finish. The ring but he noticed I had a ¢ gives you odds of $1,000 to fifteen dollars that you he couldn't resist the temptation to tell me ar won't croak, after they've got a doctor to give ‘em a unfailing remedy for it."—Clevelend Leader. “If you don't get up and start at once I'll march the regiment off and leave every d—d one of you behind They started.—Saturday Evening Post. Live is published every Thursday. $5.00 a year in advance. Postage to No contribution will be returned unless accompanied by stamped and ad» foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.04 a year extra. Single current copies, dressed envelope. 10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from date of publication, 25 cents. Fab iilaaivat f Sorivtitdiand visi aced Lire is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain, ‘The International News keeled 5h abi, Sinelanlbiaaatiitiiik /sataiehaai Company, Bream’s Building, Chancery Lane, London, E.C., England, Acests. Pr WILSON Thats All! mpt notification should be sent by subscribers of any change of address. Patronize American industries. Weara the creation par excellence of the nation. Agencies in all the principal cities in the world. San Francisco—Four Days irom New York or Boston—By New York Central. comicbooks.com