Life — October 26, 1905 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

STYLES WHILE YOU WAIT. Mrs. Sryte: I want a hat, but it must be in the latest sty! Suorsax: Kindly take a chair, madam, and wait a few minutes; the fashion is just ch: AFRAID OF THOSE WITH HORNS. about r had been telling the class nily ame some thi: ngerous to get near to and Automobiles!” Je Jimmie Jones, prompt y World. \ proressionat man who is well known in upper ide circles has a Chinese cook, and he recently ed John to make a large, handsome cake fc birthday occasion, When the cake appeared on table it was a triumph of art, frosted and great but to the of t bore the initiats “J. C.," which member of the family. Re forced to the ec had West corated. were not atly, but wi skill, surprise of ever: present those of any 1 siasm become ore conservative of the shocked, feast was over guests. were host went to ex John why those initials must not be used for future. As the explanation proceed: . John became much excited. “Oh, hellee dam no!” he exclaimed. Sun “Him Jelly York UNQUESTIONABLY. railway lise. wrote the Western boomer, in reply, strictly Forty-seven persons here have bee the cars or knocked off the track in the last six months alone."—Chicago Tribune. modern street in wrote the Eastern capi “Have system “Our street railway syste and a real estate agent town in “is ate. over by up to run one of His Ma Bystonder, ject of He arranged phone to discourse ay The first picture was ¢ Garden of Eden. The sailor could think of nothing suitable. Suddenly a large sty’s ships, re- magic enes who fe music Tite ct in of The L lantern lecture, from the Bible.” ssessed agri the was giv hh with the was retween slides. Ada Eve b * whispered the chapla his bra Lire is published every Thursday. $5.00 a ye: foreign countries in the Postal Union, $1.0! a year 10 cents. Back numbers, after three months frou Lire is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britai Company, Bream’s Building, Chancery Lane, Lond ar in advance. date of publication, 2 cents idea struck the jolly tar, and to the great consterna- tion of the chaplain and the delight of the audience the gramophone burst f ith the strains of “There's Only One Girl in the World For Me.” Dewine the recent dirty weather in the Channel, a certain yacht in the big class took an involuntary cr nt isions in the fo'castle se in deep water, pr \ LONG FAREWELL TO ALL MY GREATNESS.” “PAKEWELL! ran woundily short. Guess, then, the feelings of the owner of that boat, when, after voluntarily victuall his crew for three days, he received a deputation 1 the churls complaining of the quality of the damyerize!” cried he, “you've been get- finest rumpsteak that was to be had in ton—steak from my own table, juicy, succu- Southam lent, tender—' “That's jest the trouble, sir,” fected dog; “there ain't no ‘chaw’ in itt Times, whined the disaf- Sporting ARRANT NONSENSE. If you saw a pink pug puppy playing a pig, Or a great gray goose a-golfing with a goat, Would you think it was as funny as a big, brow: Belgian bunny Blowing bubbles with a bishop in a boat? ping pong wi If a gormandizing gobbler gobbles goc gross, Which he pilfered from a peanut Could he carn his absolution t If he gave the Dago man his full an act of restitution back a Jap 38 i If a singing stegomyia stur nthe And injected venomed vi Would the microbe not prove sterile, sine a Yellow Peril, If the homeopathic theory obtains? If a gentle jokesmith jabbers nutty nonsense in a way That causes you brain softening to dread. Would you send him to a college where they hammer knowledge Into people that are foolish in the cad? CONSOLING. There is an evangelist in Boston vout that, so his friends aver, he scarcely eve mits himself a secular thought tong worldly word. It appears that this eva daughter, aged five. Not the door-bell, and found there the iceman with “Father is not home,” she said, “but if you come in, you poor, perishing perhaps will pray for you."—Harper's Meet a very bright answered bith since she “itl It is customary in the cheaper classes of German inns to substitute chicory for coffee. Bismarck aware of this, so one day when he came to inn, after a long journey, he sat dow innkeeper to him. “Have you any chicory?” said | “Yes, sir," said the innkeeper. “Well, bring all you have here to me,” Bismarck. The innkeeper was gone a few turned with an immense arr “Is this all the chicory you have i how i asked Bismarck. ‘es—alll.”* “Well, then,” said Bismar here and make me a cup of coffee.” small minutes ani re No contribution will be returnes dressed envelope. Postage to xtra. Single current copies, The illustrations in Live ave copy 4 notification should be seni The International News E.C., England, Acents. { unless accompanied by stamped and ads righted, and are not to be reprodu subscribers of any change of addrests tb WILSON WHISKEY That’s Drawn from Age, Purity and concentrated in one All! at all ret Sold Wit. Quintessence. Flavor is the Unapproachable Quality of ‘Hunter Whiskey Jaes cafes and by jobbers. LANAHAN & SON, Baltimore, Md. First-Class Hotels and Clubs, on Wheels The Through Trains of ... The New York Central comicbooks.com