Life, 1905-09-07 · page 16 of 42
Life — September 7, 1905 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct satirical pieces: **"The S.P.C.A." section** critiques the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals in New York City. The satire targets the organization's hypocrisy: while it claims to protect animals, it aggressively collects fines from traffic violators, enriching itself rather than genuinely preventing harm. The writer notes the irony that reckless automobile drivers—who endanger the very animals the S.P.C.A. claims to protect—go largely unregulated, while the organization profits from fines. The piece exposes the gap between the organization's humanitarian mission and its actual profit-driven operation. **"Investigation" dialogue** at the bottom mocks corporate corruption. A trust leader asks if a "doctored statement" of corporate affairs is ready, then says he'll "arrange immediately for an investigation"—implying he'll control the investigation's outcome. It satirizes how corporations manipulate investigations to appear legitimate while concealing misconduct. Both pieces critique institutional hypocrisy and corruption.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
280 -LIFE- . his stuff. That is, he could tell his friends and other editors that he the checks read differently. ten cents a word for t ten cents a word— Citaprer DLIV. Tootsia- Fifteen years later, in the winter of Wootsia discovered that Kickn: tarved in order to buy her library. She immedi: nt a private view of the garret and of the lady behind the th and then succumbed to the shock. She had h and I n partition, d the same lish fiction virit scene many times before in Fren but the awful reality In the spring of 1940, Horace Clot Scavage W it crushed her s Kickman “ Are you not marricd to ia-Wootsia yet?" asked Kickman No." replied H Re “she has been bedridden ni an, | hardly like to men fear that Tootsia-Wootsia nay not be very strong red Kickman, sternly, ‘if you are not arry her, Iam." asked Horace, subi nh the finesse of a if she doesn’t wish to . Wi great can you marry I marry you?" Kickman drew himself magnificently to all his slender height *L have achieved some impossible tl he said simply“ Ehave had my poems publist Clotheslir ed admiration illing to admit now t your do Kickman, “every child in the now s word Clothesline turned and left him pon for son There are no barriers betwee * the “ Love has poet mi ht me to hold on tomy mured, clas} g her mly too happy’ without the slig! ndon specialist who had been ¢ sia-Wootsia’s case Love has cured you “ For the first nt of the garret in wh Kickman, Tootsia-W. broke in her toes.” time in fic , loving heart Mrs. Wilson Woodrow. A Sign. RIGGS: I sce that the members of the Beef Trust have all been indicted. “Just what does that me: “Well, I suppose it means that the price of meat is 2 going up." ALL HAVE OUR FUNNY RELATIONS. SHOW COUSIN MATTIE AND SILAS AROUND, AND LET PEOPLE GRIN=THERE'S NOMA ur K_AWPULLY PUSSY IN TOWN, “RK A Ste ON A FARM The S. P. C. A. CCORDING to things, but is that is, the 1 vanity, to conceive onc DSOp possible nd w ntered upon craftine n why lequate re nization ostensibly engaged in protec ¢ dumb Is should collect the fines imposed for violation of lati les? And yet > so-called Society for the Prevention of New York City does. It collects— more than that, it demands—every of these and adds them to the fat revenues which go to maintain rble Chapel of Twenty-sixth Street the speed reg what t governi this Ity to Animals in nes ase at Madison Avenue and However, if one r noment, consider the other aspect of this profi y humane idea it expresses! T cless automobile driver unquestionabl the tection of Jo! ngers the lives and limbs of n the Society for the Pro- n P. Haines does so much to safeguard in our crowded highways horses, dogs and cats wh: Investigation. EAD OF TRUST: Have you finished that doctored statement of the affairs of the corporation ? Secretary: Yes. “Good. I'll arrange immediately for an investigation ee