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Life, 1905-07-06 · page 7 of 44

Life — July 6, 1905 — page 7: what you’re looking at

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Life — July 6, 1905 — page 7: Life, 1905-07-06

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertising and humor columns**, not political satire. The content includes: **Left side:** Advertisement for "White Rock" mineral water, using patriotic language ("honor of her birthday") to promote the product to gentlemen. **Center:** Three humorous anecdotes titled "Overheard by the Office Boy," "A Primer Lesson," "A Slight Mistake," "A Preference," and "Racing by the Sea"—brief jokes about everyday situations (women's dresses, cigars, bishops, horse racing). **Right side:** A large advertisement for Makaroff Russian Cigarettes, emphasizing their quality and purity, with a mail-order coupon. **Bottom:** Advertisements for Blair's Pills, hair goods, and a hairdresser. The page reflects early 20th-century advertising aesthetics and humor conventions rather than political commentary.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OUR COUNTRY! When you glory in her greatness remember—not the least of her blessings is this sparkling water we drink in honor of her birthday. HAIR GOODS Choice Imported Ornaments J. ANDRE LADIES’ HAIRDRESSER 13 West 29th St?, N. Y. City Specialist hair coloring, Marcel waving shampooing, manicuring, clectrk facial massage. Overheard by the Office Boy. “T HE editor looks downcast. What's the | matter with him?” “He received a letter yesterday informing him of an inheritance, and in the rush he re- plied: ‘Declined with thanks.’ ’—Translated for Tares from “Meggendorfer Blatter.” Do you want to know where is the best fishing in America? Write for handsome booklet, ‘Fishing and Shooting,” mentioning Live, Canadian Pacific Railway. Robert Kerr, Passenger Traffic Manager, Montreal, Canada. A Primer Lesson. S the woman. Why is she so cros: Oh, she’s having a lot of dresses made. See the other woman. Why is she so cross? Because she isn’t having a lot of dresses made. Women are queer creatures, are they not?— Louisville Courier Journal. A SLIGHT MISTAKE, hug you as I long todo, will you wait just one moment? Why wait? I simply want ‘to remove these cigars from my waistcoat pocket. Being Fonseca’s, they are too valuable to be crushed. A Preference. HE late Bishop of London was once or- dered by his physician to spend the win- ter in Algiers. The bishop said it was impos- sible, he had so many engagements, “Well, my lord bishop,” said the specialist, “it cither means Algiers or heaven. “Oh, in that case,” said the bishop, “I'll go to Algiers."—A rgonaut. Racing by the Sea. RIGHTON differs from every other race course in America in that it offers the happy combination of a seaside resort and a battleground for the kingly thor- oughbred. The features of the meeting are varied and attract ive, and at Brighton from July 6 to July 29, inclusive, these features will attract in royal contest the best horses in training, The Brighton Mile on the open- ing day is a race in which the fleetest and stoutest thoroughbreds in America will meet, and racing over America’s fastest track it will be strange indeed if a new world’s record is not made. The pitce de résistance of the meeting—of the turf season—is the Brighton Handicap, reserved for Saturday, July 8 This event not only is America’s richest all-aged handicap, having a guaranteed value | of $25,000, but it is in addition the best race of the year. Here the winners of the other big handicaps of the | year, the Metropolitan, the Brooklyn and the Suburban, meet in final contest for supremacy. The queenly Beldame, winner of the Suburban; the fleet | Dethi, winner of the Brooklyn; the flying Sysonby ; the glorious cripp‘e, Irish Lad, and other great horses are candi- dates for the Brighton. For three successive years the winner of the Brighton has hung up a new record for the distance, one mile and a quarter. In 1902 it was Gold Heels, the champion of that year. In 193 it was Waterboy, the champion of his year. And last year it was the fleet and stout-hearted Broomstick who performed the undreamed of feat of running a mile and a quarter in 2:02 4/5—faster time than ever was made by any other horse, over any kind of a course—circular or straightaway. The $15,0.0 Brighton Derby at a mile and a half, the $7,500 Brighton Oaks and the $7,500 Iroquois Stakes at a mile and a quarter have attracted the best three-year-olds in training, just as the $15,000 Brighton Junior Stakes, the $7,500 Neptune Stakes and the $7,500 Venus Stakes have the*-ream of the two-year-old division engaged. . He: Darling, before I put my is around you and feat Theo os You can smoke MAKAROFF RUSSIAN CIGARETS from morning until night without a trace of that “dopey” or nervous feeling induced by other cigarets. They will leave in your office or apartments no trace of the odor usually associ- ated with cigarets. They are made of real tobacco, pure, clean and sweet, and nothing else. They are mild and smooth, but rich in natural flavor, and as full of “body” as the most critical connoisseur could wish. They contain a less percentage of nicotine than any others and the mouthpiece takes up most of that. ‘The tobacco never comes in contact with the mouth, therefore does not become wet and bitter, to spoil the flavor and stain the fingers. ‘They are rolled by hand, and incased in the thinnest ,Paper in the world, No paste is used. You can afford to go into this matter thoroughly. You y cannot afford not to, if you want to enjoy cigaretsat their | best, without injury to your health or offente to your own sense of refinement or that of your friends, Isell direct to smokers, first-class clubs and hotels. I -will gladly send full information about these cigarets, but the final and only test, if you are in earnest, is a trial of the goods. I take all the risk of this trial, so there is no reason why you should delay it. A New Kind of Offer Send me your order for a trial hundred of the size and quality you prefer. Try the cigarcts thoroughly, smoke the full hundred if you like. Then, if you do not like them, tell me and I will return your money, I do not ask the return of the cigarets, Iprefer to take my chances of youT giving them to some one who will like them and who will order more. Send an order now and get acquainted with feal cigaret luxury. — Special to Dealers. —Iam spending over $1,000.00 a month in magazine advertising to introduce these goods, 1 want one first-class dealer in every town of importance as distributor. To such I can turn over a gvod business, established and growing. Write me. James Howard Kehler, 850 Fine Arts Building, Chicago stsennensee MAIL THIS COUPON TOmuEE JAMES HOWARD KEHLE xo Fine Arts Building, CHICAGO Nas SOLE DISTAIGUTOR IN AMERICAYTOR CIGARETS) “(Write your name and-address In the margin.) comicbooks.com