Life, 1905-05-04 · page 23 of 48
Life — May 4, 1905 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct satirical pieces: **Top Section - "Life" Editorial:** Mocks Professor Loeb's artificial life-creation experiments (likely Jacques Loeb's early 1900s work on sea-urchin reproduction). The satire envisions a dystopian future where artificially-created humans ("urchins") solve labor problems but create absurd social consequences: all people would be male, embarrassing department stores and the Mormon Church. It's satirizing both overconfident scientific utopianism and anxieties about gender roles. **Bottom Section - Herald Newspaper Parody:** Ridicules the *New York Herald* newspaper's sensational, self-promotional coverage of "Mary's Little Lamb." Various famous figures (Theodore Roosevelt, Dr. Parkhurst, King Edward) are quoted as if the nursery rhyme were breaking news—mocking yellow journalism's exaggeration and the Herald's boastful exclusivity claims. The byline credits James Gordon Bennett, the Herald's actual owner. The cartoonish caricature on the left appears to be Bennett himself, depicted holding lambs.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
517 Life. ‘O one really believ that Professor Loeb’s beginning with sea-urchins, in the production of life artificially isanaccident. From chins to land-, common- or garden-urchins is naturally but a step or so, and with the production of the latter the problem is solved In the new order, of course, everybody will be an urchin to begin with, No need of urchinesses will remain, unless, perchance, some trust should bafile the vigilance of the Department of Labor and Commerce, corner the chemicals, and compel a temporary resort to the crude processes which now obtain Conceivably, it will be the occasion of some embarrass- ment to the department stores, the Mormon Church, and possibly a few others, when all persons shall be of the masculine gender, but even these will, no doubt, adjust themselves. Quite Enough. IIE two girls met at the dress-goods counter. “Tam purchasing the material for my attire when I all tell the world how it shall be run,” states the sweet ks the other, who w: sweet girl graduate year, ‘‘am purchasing the material for my attire when Ishall begin telling one man how he shall be run her From which we gather that there is to be the u amount of oratory this season. By Janes Gorpox Rexxerr. As announced exclusively in the //eraéd this morning, Mary had a little lamb, Ou S correspondent reports (by special cable to the Herald) that his fleece was as white as snow, We have learned from urces controlled by the //eradd, that the lamb was sure to go wherever Mary went. President Roosevelt said to a Herald reporter : The exclusive news in the Mera/d about Mary's little Jamb fortunately comes at a time when our foreign relations were never in conditi The Heratd is t paper Dr. Parkhurst: I read the news about Mary in this morning's Herald (exclusively), with the tears streaming down my cheeks, and my heart beating fast. Thave not yet see representative in the Tenderloin, but am hoping for the best. The /erald deserves the thanks of everybody, Special from London : King Edward said this morning: The news about Mary, which I was informed appeared exclusively ia the A York Heraid, afiected me profoundly, 1 can only hope that the ties that unite the great branches of the Anglo-Saxon race in a common brotherhood may still be kept sacred and inviola When informed of the //erald’s great feat, Pierpont Morgan said : *Lwarned every one some time ago that the thing might happen. And now that the //era/d alone has given the news to the world, nothing more need be said Whe isked e would like to say a ing abo "8 When asked if he would like to say anything about the lamb’ A.WRITER OF VERSE TORE 11S MAIR WITHA CURSE, fleece being as white as snow, he buried his face in his hands for a POR NEVER A WORD RUYMEO WITH MONTH; moment, and then replied : DUT JUS LISPING WIFE SAID, VERY TACTLESSLY, FKKD, “No, [have nothing further to add.” YOU'RE A DUNTH j E COULD FIND ONE AT WONTH,"? comicbooks.com