Life — December 15, 1904 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

(THE APPROACH OF CrRISTMAS, Now comes the time when “little wi ribbon, likewise all jer of that ilk, * watches what she does With counterfeited glee; Full well he knows, the wretched man, What the result will be! Yet with a sickly interest He presses her to tell What thing it is she labors on So faithfully and well. And she, with wise, expressive smile, Says, “Curiosity!” Maintaining through the whole affair Large chunks of mystery! her creation bent, Late every night she’s up, While husband prays that from his lip May pass away this cup: Yet nought Until "tis done She doth most sweetly slave, And makes what “hubby,” on the whole, Would give worlds not to have! Orleans Times: Democrat. CLOSE CALCULATION. Extremes touch in commercial eccentricities, and the land of the is not so different from that of the pine in dities of its small traders. It was a Canada grocer who owned that it never paid him to keep white sugar. “Id t a barrel, folks buy it up so fast it's gone in less'n a week,” said “Don’t pay, I tell ye, it don’t pay!” A traveler in Philippines gives this experi ence on the Istand of Negres. fe had gone to the open-air ket, where the native women sit squatting in a row, prepared for the long financial arguments that follow the customer's first mention of a price. Live is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The loterpational News Tue proprietors of many of the saloons in the large cities add music to the other “attractinns” of their resorts. Frequently this is furnisted by 3 musician who is both a pianist and a vocalist, whos station is near the street entrance, while the “business goes on in the back room, behind the sereen doors, Late one night the owner of one of these places observed that his patrons had paused to listen to the ree cents cach,” was the answer. clear tenor voice of his musician in the outer room, There were six mangoes in the basket, and the who was singing an old melody of wonderful sweet traveler took them all and laid a twenty-cent piece in nese Some of them were standing with their glosses half-way to their lips, Others had set their liquor down untasted. He saw one dissipated old “rounder” furtively wipe away a tear. This was enough. He rushed into the outer room. “Say,” he exclaimed, in a hoarse whisper, “you mustn't sing that! You're killing business!” The musician had been singing “The Old Oaken —Youth's Companion, A CHIC RETORT. Mr. Choate's quickness at repartee is well itles trated by the following story. During a “weekend” at an English country house his neighbor at breakfast ‘one morning chanced to be a pretty American, who had come to misfortune in trying to manipulate ber egg in the English fashion, With face full of dismoy she turned to him: “Oh, Mr. Choate, what shall I do? I've droppet an egg!” “Cackle, Madame, cackle," answered the Ambassa dor.—December Lippincott’s. Aunt Jane: Edith, didn't I see Mr. Sweetser kissing you in the hall last night? . . ; Eoitn: Yes, but it was only in remembrance of Waiter: WELL, WHATLL YOU HAVE, SIR? former days, Mr. Bookworm : LET ME HAVE SOME NEW DIC- “A sort of souvenir spoon, I suppose you mean.” TIONARY, SOME KIPLING, A BIT OF HOWELLS, WITIL —Beston Transcript, CONAN DOYLE, AND A DESSERT OF LONGFELLOW, Bacon: Why does he call his dachshund “Proces mp sion the seller's lap. But she angrily snatched them back, Ecerrt: Because it takes him so long to pass a and also returned the coin. given point.—Yonkers Stetesman. “They are three cents if you buy them separately,” ay the lot, you will have to pay I wish I could live my life over agi » for I shall have none to sell to other Hovcr: Don't you think it would be a better Youth's Companion, : to live over somebody else's life?—Boston Transcript. Company, Bream's Building, Chancery Lane, London, F. C., England, Acknrs. WILSON WHISKEY That’s All! Nature’s Tonic Steel Pens te Weary Heads ana Hands Established 1860 150 Vasieties ESTERBROOKS Sold Everywhere The Best Pens Made Any Dealer Anywhere Any Place, Fastest Trains in the World—On the New York Central. comicbooks.com