Life, 1904-07-28 · page 9 of 20
Life — July 28, 1904 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two political cartoons satirizing early 20th-century American politics. The left section shows "Platform Number One" and "Platform Number Two," presenting contrasting Republican and Democratic party positions. The Republican platform emphasizes economic stability and tariff protectionism, while the Democratic platform discusses monetary policy and critiques of Republican governance. Below these texts are illustrations of two men in formal dress appearing to make political arguments, likely representing party spokesmen. The image labeled "Noah's Ark" (bottom right) appears to be a separate satirical illustration, though its specific political reference is unclear from the visible text. The cartoons use dialogue and visual caricature to mock the competing claims and platforms of the two major parties, a typical strategy in Life magazine's political satire during the Progressive Era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE- Te Polat the Loy STS. chee ewer fay9 A PAGE OF THE SAME ISSUE AS IT ENTERED RUSSIA, sixty thousand acres to walk on. There's lots of public highways all around the mountains. We private preservers ought to have the pleasure of seclusion and quiet. Those com- mon people don’t appreciate the woods. How can they ?"" R. S. Spears. Holidays. HE Romans, to make a holiday, herded a few hundred gladia- tors in an arena, and watched them while they hewed one another in pieces. It was a dull and fleeting spectacle. They knew nothing of gunpowder. Nor did they understand the possi- bilities of tetanus, whereby the fun may be prolonged for weeks, or even months. But more than all, they had not risen to the largeness of soul, in virtue of which a man finds more delight in blowing his own hands off, or his own eyes out, than in seeing another man butchered. Is it that the Christian ideal of un- selfishness finds its expression even in our moments of relaxation? Platform Number One. (Revised Edition.) E, the Republican Party, solemaly as- sembled by the grace of John D. Rockefeller and the sanction of Pierpont Morgan, do hereby affirm the following prin- ciples: In the first place, we call attention to the fact that we have saved the country from ruin and disaster so many times in the past, that now in its mostcritical condition, with the stock market wavering in the balance, there is no possible hope except in US. If in the past ive had not insisted upon a large and lucrative Tariff, in accordance with that spirit of strict economy for which we are so justly celebrated, how could the godlike Carnegie have been able to spread abroad over this vast land the fruits of education ? Tf we had not increased the pension list until it is rapidly exceeding the popu- lation of our noble country, how could those veterans of the War, the G.A.R., keep up their establish- ments ? If we had not grabbed Spain by the throat, and compelled her to give the downtrodden Filipinos all the benefit of freedom, how could the invigorating influence of our home- brewed highballs be now felt wher- ever the sun rises and sets? And if, with that true magna nimity that extends even to the unfortunate, we had not stepped forward and shielded from the whips and scorn of calumny, some of our light-fingered Post Office employees, who knows, but now, all of our George Washington postage stamps might be a drug on the market ? PLATFORM NUMBER Two. We, the Democratic Party, herewith assem- bled, do solemnly affirm that we are about half of us for silver and the other half for gold, and the rest scattering. Not being able to get rid of some of our leaders, we propose to carry them along with us and get along the best way we can, And so, let us bray NOAH's ARK.