Life — July 28, 1904 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LURE: THE LAZY MAN'S WAY. When I want to broaden my shoulders No physical culture for me. T'll just hie me down to the tailor's, For he does it quicker, you sce Indianapolis Sun. “Waar do you think of the platform?” “It's gre said Senator Flubb. “There a plank in it that can't be twisted around to mean something else."—Chicago Record-Herald. THE INFANT takes first to human milk; that failing, the mother turns at once to Borden's Eagle Brand Condensed Milk, the best infant food, Gurst: 1 want a good porterhouse steak. Waiter: Gents that order porterhouse steak are | required to make a deposit, sir.—Chicogo Tribune. Wittie: Pa, what is a philanthropist, anyway? Pa: A philanthropist, my son, is merely a man whe bas more money than he can possibly use him self.—Philadelphia Ledger HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. The ideal hotel of America for permanent and transient guests. Kurorarxiy: I await the Japanese advance with confidence. Tue Czar: But why await? “ How otherwise can I show my confidence? "—Cleve- land Plain Dealer. Tomson: The doctor said I could have one glass of beer a day. Jonson: And you are obeying orders? “Yep. Dut I'm five weeks ahead of my allow Kansas City Journal. ‘Tus Sourn roe Hosrrraity: The Manor, Asheville, North Carolina, is the best inn South. Hooklet. Customer: Why doesn’t that spinster, Miss Brown, deal at your shop any more? Daarer: One of my clerks insulted her. “How?” “She overheard him telling some one that she was our st customer.” —Glasgow Evening Times. Fiest Sinpwreckeo Tovrtst: Here we are, on a desert island, with no food in sight. Seconp Suipwrecken Tourist: What difference does that make? Didn't I save a box of Fonseca’s cigars? Miss Suz Brerte: Don’t you like to hold hands? Mk. Jack Port: Yes; good hands.—Yonkers Statesman. Tne closing week of the Iirighton meeting means the last of racing in and about New York until August 27. The Brighton Oaks should prove to be a fitting finale to the close of the most successful meeting in the history of the Brighton Course. In the Oaks, Beldame, the queen of the three-year old division, and Hamburg Belle, a Futurity winner and the reigning queen-in the two-year old division of 1903, as well as a number of other good horses, will measure strides in the struggle for supremacy. First Mare: Cap'n, th’ anchor broke. Captain: Well, haven't you no ingenuity? Fast. en one of the life preservers to th’ end of th’ an- chor-cable,—Baltimore American, IMMEDIATE DELIVERIES. A light, is ~s A modern stylish, speedy (i ° asoline Gasoline [eeeede|| Touring Car | Runabout to M4 ° j A powerful hill climber : . Each part as true Bevel gear drive : \ to measurement as Wheel steerer in H 2 chronometer Simple construction ]% é Backed by the Easy to operate f Pope reputation : for quality Engine in front A type of car that appeals to Model B—like those desiring a \ illustration — reliable gasoline 1 D, runabout o Horse Power, $1,200. 6 Horse Power, y G Without tonneau, $1,050. POPE MANUFACTURING CO., Hartford, Conn. BRANCHES: Washlegton, D Cty 14th St, NW, Philadelphia, Pa.—gop Arch St. Col ve. Providence, R.L_—t5 Sow St. 18 Francisco, Cal. —agr Mission St, Cakeage, Tcepy Wells St ‘Members dasoctation Licensed Automobile Skanufacturcs, “oat OLD CROW RYE (‘“secause, It is sold straight, It brings the distiller far more price than any other made in HB. KIRK cis niti once scurvnash, and asthe best reputation. & CO., N. Y. Our Scotch Whiskies are true Glealivets ; are sold straight. eo IN. Xe The Souvenir is old. “The Bon: sb DUSTLESS COMFORT. The dustiest road made d Absolute cleanliness and perfe dom from dust, even when traveling High speed, is positively assured with the Brown Dust Deflector. ._ Simple, practical and thoroughly effect- ive. Readily attached to any car—in no way detracts from its beauty or inter- feres with the door. Heartily endorsed by prominent auto- mobilists. Sizes and shapes of all lead- ing makes carried in stoc Sent on approval to responsible people. Write for descriptive booklet. W. H. BROWN, 134 West Jartson Bird, Chicago. comicbooks.com