Life — February 4, 1904 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Quepys on Pepys. (A London paper announces that the proper to be pronunciation of Pepys is discovere * Pips.) P us rejoice when now we read The works of That his longer need nied Pepys, odd bame no To tremble on our lepys. rth we shall not blunder through of Pepys, one does, who ‘The honored naw the word a gh graceful m But sy Thee sures trepys. ‘Time was, we may as well countess, When just the sight of 1 Tn print would fill us with distress id make us think of skepys. pys It is not * Peps "No, The proper way Let us pronoun nor “ Pepys 2 it always so Aud never lose our grepys. W. D, Nesbit. Must Economize. * [ET me see,” mused the young -*4 man, “I sent her a New Year's remembrance, and here is St. Valen- tine’s Day coming on. That will cost me something. After that there will be Easter flowers, and then her birth. day isin June. Later, there will have to be drives and theatres and candy and flowers and books, and first thing I know it will be Christmas again, and once more I'll think of bankruptey. On the whole, I believe the sensible thing to do will be to marry her.” Poor Philadelphia ! A\S the winter deepens, Philadelphia + is becoming more and more sen- sible of the delights of being a way station on the great Pennsylvania Road, Philadelphians returning from afar, with visions of domestic joys ahead, find themselves dumped some- where in that wild suburban waste which lies west of the Schuylkill, and far from their happy homes. They % have long known that such a region existed; but exploring suburbs is not a Philadelphia custom; and this deso- late tract, surrounded by yawning chasms, is the last spot on which they would voluntarily set foot. The tun- nel in which they are forced to alight “LIPE THE SNOW MAN S 00 is not wholly dissimilar to Dante's hell, as presented by Sir Henry Irving —full of dim lights, and curling smok and hideous noises, and lost souls wan- dering confusedly in the gloom. Through this place of horror pa: countless suburban trains on their way to the city’s heart; but into these the 42) homebound traveler is not permitted toenter. He sees them speed by to comfort and to safety, as he gropes his way through subterrane inths up into the light of n laby: A grim waiting-room decorated with spittoons, a stand for the accommodation of ab- sent cabs, an unfamiliar street that look if it had been recently up- heaved by an earthquake meet his de- jected gaze. Hunger may be gnawing his vitals, but he is miles aw: food, Cold may be chilling hi: He will be colder still, faring eastward on the back platform of a trolley car, —presuming he is so fortunate as to find a foothold. In the event of a snowstorm, his fate is sealed. It is the plain duty of the Humane Society to import a few robust St. Bernard dogs, to be used exclusively in tracking the patrons of the Pennsylvania Railroad, lost on their homeward way. If it be Mr, Cassatt’s purpose to counteract that love of comfort and luxury which we are told is eating the soul of our nation, he has shown himself to be as potent and a resourceful as Lycurgus. Under his rtan rule Philadelphians are grow- ing every day more splendidly strenu- ous and profane. Perhaps, until the race is wholly inured to hardships, some ameliorating measures might be permissible. A line of omnibuses might be started, to convey Pennsyl- vania Railway passengers into Phila- delphia ; and a coffee and sandwich van might be located by philanthro- pists outside the station door. Agnes Repplier, Protection. "PHE protective policy, which Mr. Chamberlain is getting the Eng- lish to adopt, is easily worth while for its own sake, as the good crops and ther we are having in this country amply attest. But that is by no means all. Protection is worth money to those who have money. In this way pro- tection brings money into politics, until presently we have the condition whereby nothing can be done in poli- tics without mone; This condition is probably more to be relied on by the existing order than a million stout soldiers. comicbooks.com