Life — July 23, 1903 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A Golfer's Plea. WEETHEART, ere sunlight wanes, And the evening winds grow gruesome, YY Jostoating down the lonely lanes, Let us play a truant ‘two-some.” All the air is sweet with song For a lassie and her laddy ;— We will only take along Cupid for a caddy ! the How the gleaming green invites, And the beaming blue above, dear! ‘Tis a day for dream-delights,— "Tis a day for golf and love, dear! Kisses! — they shall mark the score For a Jassie and her laddy ; We have often had before Cupid for a caddy! On the length of all the links There's no caddy half so skilly; He is artful as @ minx, Captivates one willy-nilly. Fast he holds the hearts in thrall Of a lassie and her laddy ; Let us keep, for ‘good and all,” Cupid foracaddy! — sounett Stephens. The Rest Cure. A.M. Nurse takes temperature and counts pulse and respira- Bath and breathing exercises. Medicine. Breakfast. Visit from resident physician. Massage. A glass of milk. Visit from my own physician, who counsels freedom from worry, relaxation, making ‘a carcass of your body and a jelly of your brain,” and as much sleep as possible. “lowers from a friend. Doctor extracts a drop of blood from the ear for examination. Medicine. Dinner. Visit from neighboring patient who nst rules, and gives the history of her complicated case. Have just fallen into a doze when the head nurse comes in to see how I am resting. 30. A glass of milk. 00. Electricity. Time to be weighed. :00. Nurse comes in to lower blind, and tells of a woman who has just arrived and complained because a young man in white ETRE duck asked her impertinent questions. ‘“Why, that was the doctor,” the nurse interposed. “Good Heavens!" the woman exclaimed, “T thought it was the cook !”” 4:30. A cup of beef tea. 5:00. Letters. M ine. Supper. Visit from resident physician. A cold pack. A glass of milk. Thoroughly exhausted, ‘‘ Tired Nature's awect restorer, balmy sleep,” comes to my relief at last. SW.HR. Universities. THE case of the student at Yale, who spent eleven thousand dollars in a year, is in a sense sporadic, but it is not without ifs general significance. The truth of the matter seems to be, American students, striking an average of pecuniary worth, can now afford to drink almost, if not quite, enough to raise our best universities to the level of Heidelberg, Berlin or Bonn. As for the use of tobacco, we have the Ger- man universities clearly beaten up the alley. In a word, our boys have no longer any need to go abroad for the genuine academic atmosphere. Too Previous. ee ANXIOUS MOTHER: Are you sure my son has appendicitis? Tue Exinent SpEcIALIsT: We can tell you better, madam, after the operation. Courtesies. T once the American fleet cast anchor, the Kaiser got away, exchanging visits at a slow, warming- up pace of seven visits a minute. Ten minutes later, his Majesty, re- marking that he never felt fitter in his life, increased the clip to fifteen a minute. At the one hundred and twenty-sixth visit the American was breathing hard, but he held out until three hundred and sixty-one visits had been ex- changed. The Kaiser showed that he could honor a brave adversary in defeat by laughing heartily in English and _pre- senting each ship of the squadron with his complete works in five thousand volumes. Ts4tT was a charming wedding the other day at Grabstock. The bride, Miss Tootsie Pushe, was just lovely. And the groom, Lord Drink- more, was too sweet for anything with his pearl-gray trousers and dissipated face. The trousers were paid for by the bride’s father. New York fashionable society is quite excited over afresh mystery. It appears that Mrs. Dullern Deth, at a dinner recently, had a look of merri- ment in her eyes and seemed, for an instant, on the point of saying some- thing with a point to it. But it was only for an instant. The look van- ished and she went on with her din- ner. She was one of the Sollums of Philadelphia—a very old family. The Ammi Innitts are lavish enter- tainers at Newport this summer. They gave an al fresco lunch on Wednesday that cost sixty-five hundred dollars. All the people worth knowing were EX Lf comicbooks.com