Life, 1903-04-30 · page 14 of 20
Life — April 30, 1903 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct satirical pieces: **"Love at First Sight"** (left): A sketch mocking romantic melodrama, showing a kneeling woman before a statue of "Emperor Nero," satirizing overwrought courtship rituals and historical pretension. **"With All My Heart"** (center): A poem by Felix Carmen about giving one's heart to a woman, using romantic clichés ("whole heart, wholly yours") that Life likely presents ironically. **"A Healthy Symptom"** (bottom right): A brief comic dialogue where Mrs. McFee boasts her rheumatism is so vigorous it requires no treatment—satirizing either health quackery or Irish working-class resilience through humor. **Vivisection paragraph** (lower left): References a 1758 newspaper protest against medical professors conducting cruel animal experiments, suggesting this "scientific" cruelty is historically persistent, not modern. The page uses period humor conventions: romantic satire, Irish dialect comedy, and historical irony about scientific ethics.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
woes eee? \ FpHis paragraph from the Stratford- on-Avon J//erald tends to show that the cutting up of live animals is not such a very new idea. ‘' Scientists” had their fun even in oldish times, ‘ot only we new men that fn the fying of a wheel cry down the past** have hated the prac- Uce of vivisection. In the /d/er of 1758 we find B protest agatnst It, and it ts stated that “the in- terior professors of medicine is a race of wretches whose lives are on!y varied by varieties of cruelty, and whose favourable amusement Is to natl dogs With All My Heart. AY YRTILLA, when I think of all The hearts that you have broken, I own the chance seems very small For still another token ; But since life's pleasure whil Isw My he: you choose to mak; t, dear girl, to you I give To bless or bruise or break it. I count your conquests on the line, All sorts and sha pes and sizes ; And tremble when I think lest mine Be added to your prizes: Yet, Nothing ventured, nothing won,— The ancient proverb tells me, And so a daring deed I've done Because my love compels me. Awhole heart, wholly yours, my dear; It beats in such a fashion Fc LOVE AT Fins siowt, to tables, and open them ailve to see how long life may be continued In various degrees of mutilation,” All Day. “« TT ER novel is one of the ephemeral successes.’? “Indeed?” “Oh, yes. It was published before nine o'clock in the morning and was not completely forgotten until quite a bit after six o’clock in the evening.” ‘That should you listen you might hear The music of its passion : Take it and all its love, and may It be my, to find it Beating in time, some happy day, With your own heart behind it! Feliz. Carmen, A Healthy Symptom. N ISS ANGELL: And what are you doing for your rheumatism? Mrs. McFee: ’Deed, an’I don’t need todo a thing for it; it’s able an’ willin’ to work for itself. T is cake—not bread— that the world is struggling for. RECENT FICTION, “THE seats or THe xtouTY.” comicbooks.com