Life — January 29, 1903 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“LAZY GERM'S" OPPOSI found the germs of this and that— The germs of that and this And cry, “O, hurry up and find germs that make us thin or fat, A germ to make him wor! he germs that make us kiss; us fall in love— Oxce, when the press in the Carson City Appeal I hope they'll never jerk had just started to run, the late John Mackay ‘copes above rushed into the editorial sanctum and called to germs that make us work! Sam Davis in an excited tone of voice: They'll hold us in a grasp unkind And warn us not to shirk, —Chicago Tribune. m, stop MR, DOOLEY ON GENEROSITY, Whin a man begins makin’ money In bis y at annything but games fv chance, he niver can come gin‘rous late in life. He may make a bi at it. Some men are gin‘rous with a crutch Seq men get the use of their gin’rosity back suédes whin they ar-re in danger. Whin Clancy the mb was caught in a fire in th’ Halsted Sthrect Patsy Hotel he howled fr'm a window: “I'l give t the press! Stop the press The seth of $5 {0% “What's the matter, John?” Davis asked in Torn from bis y nest He gallivant ‘round, kes rest s the germ of calm content acefully will lurk re comes, on mischief bent, dollars to annywan that'll take me down.” Cs; Mincban put up a laddher an’ climbed to bim « alarm. carrid him to the sthreect. Half-way down th’ | “Why, old man Crooks" (famous for bis sting!- Ger th’ brave rayscooer was tis Girly choise ness)—"‘old man Crooks has just presented a peck Burdbeas “We dlecovered attherennt ot apples to the orphans’ home, and he'll be broken- ey tan ced. bean. aes hearted if you don’t have a column and a halt . , th’ rewa five dollars. His gin'rost about it in the paper this afternoon.”—Exchange. pr reward to: Ave Aplian ts gla're that makes us work a suddenly par'lyzed again. “Do you mean to tell me that you were paid for "d stay gin'rous to th’ end nive The germ of acks o ye'er gin’rosity idle too long. Don't run it try answered Senator Sorghum, “I had to th’ top iv its speed, but fr'm day to é ¢ motive, didn't 17 A who would vote a little gintle exercise to keep it s that way without any excuse at all would be an ex- arty an’ in due time ye may injye ample of total depravity.""—Washington Star. Observations by Mr. Dooley. Our head And m: E He circles in tobacco smoke with . alle and smirk exertion Is to choke hat makes us work. Maxy occupations have diseases which are more Here is another Dr. Parker story. He was arg or less incidental to them, and literature is not ing with a man on the problem of continued ext exempt. The two most prevalent literary maladies ence, and at the door the friend declared is found are’ writer's cramp and swelled head. The unfor- “The fact is, I am an annibilationist. 1 belie Now we alized tunate thing about writer's cramp ix that it is that when [ die that will the end of pe By folks who will not have us ‘round never cured. The unfortu thing about swelled “Thank God for that!" exclaimed the doctor, ay Unless we're pasteurize head is that it never kills. A. P. banged the door.—Neie York Tribune Live ts for by all Newsdealers In Great Britain, The International News Company, Bream's Building, Chancery Lan : . England, Established 1823. Esterbroc k sterDroo WILSON on a pen Is an absolute WHISKEY. Professionalpe S|No.Ar. The Expert i Penman’s Favorite, Very elastic. That’s All! Over rsofi, [varieties of THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., iin to suit taitimore, Md. pene pose. All stationers\|/have them. Neglect of a Cough or Sore]|| CHESTER. CREST, A bsti Throat may result In an In- North Fourth Ave., Mouat Vernon, N. ¥ ccept no\/substitute. curable Throat Troable or | resort wath every com Consomption. For relief : es ; fuipa. sw nuomss mioscnau| |" "nnn ilar Youwenants aeotsseuen || Unequalledin PURITY FLAN TROCHES. Nothing excels . Avery, Manager, this simple remedy. Sold only in boxe nt Vernon, ALL GROCERS: oy | s: eeapaaa FOR WEAK STOMACHS A PLEASANT AND & AGREEABLE BEVERAGE ARMOUR & COMPANY, CHICAGO , VIQLETTES w CZAR 72.660 Gasmenssee, peneume oy comicbooks.com