Life — January 8, 1903 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Life’s Dictionary of Interna- tional Biography. LEO TOLSTO!, THE Russian Government has not yet begun erecting statues to this crank, but then the Russian Govern- ment is young. There are cranks and cranks. Some men are born cranks, some A ettizen of the world.” men have crankiness thrust upon them, and others acquire it. Tolstoi is all three. A crank has been variously de- fined, but in general it may be said he is one who is so far in the minority as to be a present failure and a future attern, This gentleman is a citizen of tho world, incidentally born in Russia. He is very much set in his ideas, and believes in the strange doctrine of pov- erty. But this is doubtless due to his environment, Had he been born in this country and had the advantage of living near enongh to Uncle Russell Sage and Pierpont Morgan, he would probably have realized the error of his ways. At present he is groping around in the dark, insisting that honesty is the best policy. , where. «LIFE « Leo Tolstoi does not believe in insti- tutions, but then he has never seen the Beef Trust in active play or sniffed at the Standard Oil Mint. Leo Tolstoi does not believe in mar- riage. But then he has never lived in Chicago. Altogether, he is a hopeless lot. Afilicted with a positive mania for tell- 4 the truth, he is out of place any- As a reformer, he has done nothing but live up to what he believes in—always fatal in a reformer, As a preacher, he has preached to the pulpit instead of from it—an unforgivable sin—and, as an all-around crank, he has been so unconventional as to be in continual ‘bad form.’’ Newport wouldn't tolerate him for a day. There is nothing, then, for Leo Tolstoi to do but to acknowledge him- self de trop. In the meantime, Money is ‘*It.’” Tom Masson, Esoteric. T HE principles of world politics are esoteric. They have to be. Other- wise they would be absurd. When the British forcibly possess themselves of the orderly, decent Boers and their country and make them a Crown colony, we Americans say never a word. But how we bristle when there is talk of the British or the Germans taking a slice of South America away from a gang of turbulent, unreliable Spaniards ! It wonld be quite inexplicable, were it not world politics, DITOR OF L1 ~ Dear Sir: 1 ask your attention to the en- closed, and in this connection would state that I regretfally stopped my subscription to what I considered the wittiest paper pubilshed in the world becanse of {8 narrowness on many ques- tons, chlef of which I can mention vivisection and Impertalism. Very truly, wow. W. December 8. Our thanks; but we think this cor- respondent a little unjust, perhaps, in his application of ‘‘ narrowness.” As “ wor's DaT rou say? YoU DON'T Love ET Mow! DEN PLL JEST RVERLASTIN'LY Law YER TILL YER Dogs.” Materia Medica. AITH is the great cura- tive principle, to be cured, when you are w need have faith in in yarbs, or prayer, In order somethin; or serum. Yarbs seem to be pretty much out of it, Prayer is cleaner than serum. You can fave faith in prayer without contracting blood poison. Prayer is naturally inexpensive, but this disadvantage is being rapidly overcome by Christian Science. Some day, perhaps, it will cost about as much to believe in p as to believe in serum, Personal. ‘DITOR: You must try and culti- vate a vein of satire. ContripuToR: How can that be done? “Well, study yourself.” [HE years are steps that break from under us as we climb, to Imperialism, events seem to be bear- ing out the correctness of Lirr’s “ nar- rowness.” In the matter of vivisection, we think the popular verdict is entitled to re- spect. FROM AN ENGLISHMAN. Talways defended your sincerity and stood up for your paper, although probably two-thirds of the time I did not agree with you Beproxb, INv., December 13, 1902, comicbooks.com