Life — December 25, 1902 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

FLOW lovely are the ladies when They lightly laugh and lie to us, all the pretty faults we ken they deny to us! ngual agility, With fanciful facility And wondrous versatility They rule (and often fool) us when ‘They act so very shy tous. We love them for the charming way They revel in mendacity, Because in lying they display Such marvelous capacity They smile, oh, so delightfally, And shame the truth so frightfully We cannot blame them, rightfully, For their finesse is, truth to say, More taking than veracity. They murder truth in artful style, And with such fetching ruthlessness, When they have reached the fatal mile ‘That marks the day of youthlessness! With what rare smiles they fib to us! How gaily talk, how glib, to us! (‘Twas heaven gave this rib to us.) Oh, may they lie the blessed while! We love them for their truthlessness ! Willie Leonard Clanahan. Church Notes. HERE will be a high-class vaudeville in the chapel on Thurs- day evening. Reserved seats can be obtained of the pastor or the sexton. Some of our leading metropolitan artists will provide amusement, and it is hoped that the church debt will .be materially re- duced, The church pews will be auctioned off this week to the highest bidders. To make the affair interesting, Mr. Looke Sharpe, the well-known New York faro dealer, has been engaged to officiate, and will entertain the an- dience with some interesting tricks. There has been a noticeable falling off in attendance at divine wor- ship lately. To remedy this, a unique feature will be made a regular part of the Sunday services hereafter. -LIFE- A banjo quartette has been engaged to conduct the musical program. The performers will be made up as end men, and there will be some of the best clog dancing ever seen in this section. Miss Bessie Bandoline will, on Friday evening at eight-thirty, give a skirt dance in the chapel for the benefit of the foreign mission fund. Those who wish choice seats are urged to procuro them early at Plunker's drug store, as an unosual attendance is expected. On Sunday afternoon, immediately after the services, the two famous prize-fighters—Fitzcorbett and Shark- puncher—will give an exhibitién of their skill for the benefit of the Sun- day School. Every child in the parish should be present. Preparations for our annual church fair are now in progress. The faro ame will be dealt by Miss Sadie Gilt- hammer, the- beautiful daughter of our popular vestryman. In place of the now out-of-date grab-bag, there will be a roulette wheel. As the per- centage in favor of the bank has been greatly increased by a device sug- gested by our pastor after a care- ful study of the machine, it is hoped that our receipts will be much more than last year, and the mortgage on the Lord’s house materially reduced, Our pastor feels the need of being on more familiar terms with the men of his congregution, apd to bring them all together, a smoker will be givenin the church on Friday evening. It is earnestly requested that each guest bring his own stein. Funny stories will be the order of the evening, and it is devoutly believed that the spirit of true comradeship will be- come more common throughout the congregation. At the concla- sion the usual contribution will be taken up, Hereafter the Thursday evening prayer meetings will be held in the homes of the members instead of in the church as formerly. The Entertainment Committee have very wisely decided that the church entertainments should not be encroached upon. Subscriptions for the new ping- pong table, which is to be a per- manent feature of the choir room, can be left with the organist or the leader of the choir. It has been pointed out a number of times in these columns that the strain of ranning his automobile is too much for our beloved pastor. He should be provided at once with a reliable chauf- feur. We suggest that the collection for the first Sunday in every month be laid aside for this purpose. PO THE EDITOR OF LIFE: Nine out of ten of your readers probably im- agine that the little paper on the “ Boon of the Century,” which appeared in Lire this week, is ouly a clever but quite baseless bit of extravagance at the expense of the med- ical profession. On the contrary, this de- sire of women to be operated upon, and the suspicious eagerness of the modern surgeon to eviscerate them on slight provocation, constitutes a very serious problem. Any one interested is advised—before offering his daughter to Moloch—to read an editorial in The Journal of the American Medical Asso- ciation for April 26, 1902, and The Brook- lyn Medical Journal of the present month. An Old-Fashioned Physician. New York, December 6. Mx, JIMMIE “Yer, SOME TIWE 4 °TRR CHRISTMAS,” comicbooks.com