Life — October 16, 1902 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT. “Ob, what a tangled web we weave When first we practice to deceiv Bat when we've had more pract How straight and fluently we lic —Philadelphia Press. MR. DOOLEY ON SWEARING. * Did ye see what th’ Prisidint said to th’ throlley man that pamped him?" asked Mr. Dooley I did not," eaid Mr, Henoessy * Tean't tell ye till T get mad,” said Mr. Dooley. * Lave us go into ixicutive sission, Whisper. That was it, Ha, ha, He give itto him etraight. A good, honest, American blankety-blank. Rale language like father ured to make whin he bit his thuinb with th’ hammer, . . They do tay his remarks singed th’ hair off th’ head iv th’ anforchanit man. “ T don't believe in profanity, Hinnissy—not as a reg’lar What was it?” ewearin’, ‘Tis impossible. I mind wanst I went to a printin’ office where a frind iv mine be th name iv Donovan held cases an’ { heerd th* foreman say : * What gintleman is settin’ A thirty?” he eays, “*Tam,’ eays @ pale gintleman with black whiskers, who was atin’ tobacco in th’ rear iv th’ room, “* Thin,’ says th’ foreman, ‘ye blankety-blank black- ‘smith, get a move on ye. D'ye think this is a annyooal incyclopejee #" he saya, * Ivrybody swore at ivrybody else, Th’ little boys ran- nin’ around with type prattled innocent pro-fanity, an’ afther awhile th’ fditor come in an* he swore more thin anoybody else, But ‘twas aisy to see he'd not larned th’ thrude iv printer, He wore with th’ enthusyasm an’ inace’racy iv an amachoor, though [ mus say, he had his good pints, I wisht I cud raymimber what it was be called th Czar iv Rooshya f'r dyin’ jus’ as th’ pa-aper was goin’ to press. I cud've often used it since. But it’s slipped me mind." — Copyright, Rodert Howard Russell, 1902, Senaton Stewant, of Nevada, tells this story of Mark ‘Twain's journalistic days in Carson City : brother at breakfast, We had just ecated ourselves at the table when a voice drawled from the etairway above * Have you read the Scripture lesson this morning?” * Yea,"" was the reply. “Had family prayer abov Yes, Sam,” eald the host, smiling at me. ‘There was a pause, and then in the now well-known draw! came the further question : ™ Said grace?" “ Yes,"" responded the patient bead of the household. * All right, then,” came the cheerful comment from the stairway; “1°11 be right down. . And presently the irreverent youth, who in a few years was to promote the gayety of nations, joined us at the break- fast table.—Argonaut. 1" continued the voice from ‘Time enddest words of tongue or pen : “ The price of coal has riz again 1" —Baltimore Herald. © Waar did youdo to the man who brought an auto- mobile to Crimson Gulch?” thing. But ithas its uses an’ its place. F'r instance, it is iasintial to some thrades, No man can be a printer without He boarded at the home of his brother, who was a model “ Well,” answered Broncho Bob, ‘in order to prevent citizen and a Christian, One morning I waa a guest of this loss 0° life we lynched ‘im.""— Washington Star, For sale by all Newadesiers inGreat Britain. The Inter- national News Company, Bream's Building, Chancery Lane, London, E. C., England, AGENTS. Established 1823. WILSON The Whiskey that made the High Ball Famous Hunter Baltimore Rye WM. LANAHAN & SON, Raltimore, Md, WHISKEY. That’s All! eel) THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., amore. Mc PP SEOOT IS eS: Ee CTs ES Tiree rerem- bles the fragrance of the liv. violet that it is impossible to them apart. Ueeontaining woo cunces $4 each Soid.at frsieclass estabiishments abr iemaeiet Ea. Baset'e Iepertaticn tee St, New York Constable CC, Carpets. Lowell Brussels Carpets, Bigelow Axminster Carpets, New and specially prepared designs. Oriental Rugs for Libraries, Dining Rooms and Halls, Designed specially for our Fail trade. Upholstery. Curtain Materials, Tapestries, Furniture Coverings, Shades, Beds and Bedding. Lace Curtains. Estimates for Furnishings on application, Rroadeay K 19h ot. NEW YORK. Cigarette of Quality AROMATIC DELICACY— MILDNESS — PURITY BLACK, STARR 4X2 FROST, 438 FIFTH AVE., NEW YORK. PRECIOUS STONES. OLD CROW RYE snton WHI Ss KEY sox DOTTLERS, NEW’ voRK: ‘ETWEEN NEW YORK AND CHICAGO IN 24 HOURS lA NEW YORK CENTRAL—LAKE SHORE ROUTE, . “LAKE SHORE LIMITED.” comicbooks.com